Roses are red but violets arent blue!!!!!

thumb_up thumb_down -14

A lady in a bank was asked by the clerk to round the sum she wanted to raise from her account. She rounded it several times, but the clerk continued to insist that the sum needs to be rounded. She left the bank confused, with a coupon consisting of completely rounded sum of 691, 88$. Next day she returned with a coupon with a rounded sum of 690,88$. The clerk asked again the lady to round the sum. The lady started helplessly to cry and said she had rounded is already with a harp, and couldn't make it round anymore, she even removed the sharp 1 from the sum.

thumb_up thumb_down -14

Q:How do you know if you have a big enough oven? A: If the jew fits

thumb_up thumb_down -14

An owl and a squirrel watch a farmer walk by. The owl turns to the squirrel and says nothing because owls are not capable of human speech. The owl then eats the squirrel because the owl is a bird of prey.

thumb_up thumb_down -14

How much booze did the homeless man drink? All of it. He is severely depressed.

thumb_up thumb_down -14

Why are Jews always so clean? Because they never come out of the shower.

thumb_up thumb_down -14

What do you get when you cross drugs with a bathtub? Whitney Houston's worst nightmare

thumb_up thumb_down -14

Penis

thumb_up thumb_down -14

whats worse than god meaner than the devil. the poor have it the rich need it nothing

thumb_up thumb_down -14

why was the boy sad? because.

thumb_up thumb_down -14

There once was a man from Peru, Who dreamed he was eating his shoe. He woke with a fright in the middle of the night and realized that his house was being robbed.

thumb_up thumb_down -14

Why can't black people be in a talent show? Because they'll steal the show.

thumb_up thumb_down -14

A black and a white man enter the bar all the people jump on the black guy to beat him up when the white guy is geting free vodka

thumb_up thumb_down -14

Why did Sarah fall off the swing? She had no arms. Knock. Knock. Whos there? Not Sarah.

thumb_up thumb_down -14

24

thumb_up thumb_down -14

Your Momma is so fat when she pressed "up" on the elevator it went crashing down.

thumb_up thumb_down -14

Why can't vampires go out in the sun? Becuase they don't exist.

thumb_up thumb_down -14

why does Chuck Norris never get wet in the rain? Because he has a very serviceable umbrella

thumb_up thumb_down -14

What do you call a bunch of black people hanging out in a barn? African American farmers socializing.

thumb_up thumb_down -14

Knock knock? Who's there? Cancer Cancer who? After some time and various bouts of radiation and chemotherapy, he finally lost his life to the terrible disease.

thumb_up thumb_down -14

Why can't Helen Keller drive? Because she's a woman

thumb_up thumb_down -14

I was once a hamster.

thumb_up thumb_down -14

How many black people does it take to complete the simplest task such as washing their own hair? A **** load! thats why slavery was so populer back in the day. (and gays were big then to because they had to shower together to remember to wash their hair).

thumb_up thumb_down -14

What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? Yo Mama!

thumb_up thumb_down -14

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops