Q: What did your mom say to your dad? A: Honey i want a divorce.

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Why'd the girl fall off the swing? She had no arms.

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Why is the kid over-weighted? Because he had to many calories in his diegestive system and he couldn't burn the calories

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What's green and has wheels? Dave Matthew's Band

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A blonde brunette and redhead all jump off a building. Who hit the ground first? The brunette because she jumped first

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whats worse then 9/11? -George W. Bush

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What do you call a guy with a car on his head? Immediate identification would not be possible. The man would be referred to by his estimated demographics. Circumstantial evidence and dental reports may be required for identification at which points the family's would be notified. Only after this will the man's name would be released to the media who would in turn report this.

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Why isnt there a womens NASCAR? Because NASCAR does not yet have the funding to start a women's league.

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What's wonderful about babies? They will die sooner or later....All Of Them

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What's worse than biting into an apple and finding a worm? Biting into another apple and finding another worm.

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Q: How many babies does it take to paint a shed? A: Considering babies are incapable of rational thought it is unlikely they would understand how to employ the correct method to paint.

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My friend told me to break a leg before the show. I disobeyed him and injured no one. It's just a figure of speech.

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Your mother is so ugly that when she looks in the mirror she feels bad about her appearance.

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Why did Doris have no control over her bladder? Because she was old and suffered catastrophic incontinence

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Q: How mature are you on a scale of 1 to 100? A: 69. :)

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Why did the man with no arms, and no legs knock on your door? He can't, he has no arms!

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Why did the chicken cross the road? To see if he could beat the oncoming car.

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PENIS THAT IS ALL!

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a man walks into a bar, his alcoholism is slowly destroying his family

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3 guys walk into a bar to tell an anti joke. The bartender asks them to leave.

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68

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Why did the dog cross the road? He was on a walk with his owner so they used a crosswalk to safely get back home.

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Why couldn't the guy find his pants? Because his girlfriend stole them last night

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What did the clerk say and do when he was givng out free food What he did:Gave them What he said:"If you want to get this free, pay $5.00"

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops