Why was six afraid of seven? Seven was pursuing his dream of becoming the world's best circus clown, which six developed a fear of in a tragic circus accident which occured in his childhood. Therefore, six was afraid of seven.

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what do you call a girl with no arms and legs whatever her name is

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Knock, knock. Who's there? Interrupting Cow. Interrupting Cow who? Interrupting Cow who, unlike his quiet friends back on the farm, enjoys to speak when others are nearly finished with their sentence.

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An anorexic women walks into McDonalds

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What's worse than accidentally flooding your bathroom? A Tsunami

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Roses are red. Violets are blue... Hold on. Roses could be white too.

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A man scratches his ankle and says " my nuts are itchy" a woman looks at him questionly. realizing he had been watched, he lifted the bottom of his pant leg and showed to woman that he had stuffed his socks with pecans.

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Knock-Knock Whos there? You're about to get shell shocked...

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Knock knock. ... ... *after waiting 30 seconds or so to no answer, the knocker concludes there is no one home and decides to go home to take his son to soccer practice and work on his taxes, and maybe call his mother to see how her foot surgery went* Who's there? Oh.. This is awkward, I forgot why I was here in the first place. I have to go. Bye.

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What do you get when you put a frog in a paper shredder? Harshly punished by the Animal Humane Society

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How do you get your clock to stop ticking? Hit it with a sledge hammer.

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When life throws you knives, you're probably dead

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Whats great about F***ing twenty one year olds? There's twenty of them.

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Why did the girl get her hair cut off? Because she had cancer

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Why was the African american pulled over in New Jersey? He was 17 and didn't have his red stickers.

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What do you get when you jump into the Red Sea? Wet.

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Q: What would George Washington do if he were alive today? A: Scream and scratch at the top of his coffin.

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What did Jesus say to the giraffe? Good day to you sir.

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"My c.ock is bigger!" "No! My c.ock is bigger!": Two gamec.ock owners arguing over who has a bigger dick.

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What's orange and sounds like a parrot? An orange parrot.

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What did the doctor say to his patient with cancer? "You have cancer...".

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Roses are red Violets are blue Tulips are white Daisies are yellow Why am I naming flower colours?

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Why did the first monkey fall out of the tree? Because he was dead. Why did the second monkey fall out of the tree? It was stapled to the first one. Why did the third monkey fall out of the tree? Monkey see, monkey do.

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Where did Mary go after the explosion? Everywhere.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops