Why did the man put his penis in the baby? Because it's warmer than a watermelon.

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What's the difference between a Mustang and a sack of dead babies? I don't have a sack of dead babies in my garage.

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What do skeet disks and Jewish babies have in common? Hitler used to shoot them out of the sky.

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i drive all the time its no big deal open the door and get behind the wheel

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How do you make Adolf Hitler angry? You can't, dead people are not sentient, and hence cannot feel anger.

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Whats is worse than a dog bite? A shark bite. Whats worse than a shark bite? The Holocaust.

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Why did the blonde switch the lamp on? Because it was getting dark

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What did the chicken do before it crossed the road? Looked both ways and then crossed with caution while looking out for oncoming vehicles.

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What does Obama, the President of the United States of America see when he closes his eyes? His eyelids

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Whats the difference between a Jew and a boy scout? Boy scouts come back from camp.

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What did the muffin, say to the other muffin? Nothing. Because muffin's are inanimate objects, therefore incapable of speech, or any other sentient action. They baked quietly until the man who was baking them came to the conclusion they were fit for consumption, devoured them, and went on with his day.

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How many black people does it take to complete the simplest task such as washing their own hair? A **** load! thats why slavery was so populer back in the day. (and gays were big then to because they had to shower together to remember to wash their hair).

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Why did the little girl fall off the swings? Because she had no arms.

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Three blondes walk into a bar. They have an intellectual conversation over some drinks.

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There was a jew, a german and you Despite you were there, the holocaust was You should feel guilty

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If quizzes are quizzical, what are tests? A question and answering session of information used to test knowledge of a specific idea or person.

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What is worse than breaking your pencil? Flying on a magic carpet

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Whats the difference between a sandwhich and a dead baby? People eat sandwhiches.

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roses are red violets are blue they are pretty and you are not

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What did the smiley face say to the other smiley face? Nothing. They just smiled.

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I had a chocolate chip cookie today, thats it, just a chocolate chip cookie.

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roses are red violets should be purple

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What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? Finding two worms.

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What are the two biggest jokes in College Football? Auburn and Florida! Roll Tide!

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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