In 1284, while the town of Hamelin was suffering from a rat infestation, a man dressed in pied clothing appeared, claiming to be a rat-catcher. He loyally promised the townsmen a solution for their problem with the rats. The townsmen in appreciation and glad to get rid of the infestation promised to pay him for the removal of the rats, they were looking forward to being left in peace. The man pleased with their decision accepted, and played a mystical musical pipe to lure the rats with a joyous song into the Weser River, where all but one drowned. Despite his renowned success, the people reneged on their promise and refused to pay the rat-catcher the full amount of money. The man left the town angry and upset the people had betrayed his kindness, he did however vow to return some time later, seeking revenge. On Saint John and Paul's day while the inhabitants were happily sat in church, he played his pipe yet again, dressed in green, like a hunter, this time attracting the young and joyful children of Hamelin. One hundred and thirty boys and girls followed him out of the town, skipping in song as they went, where they were lured into a cave. The events that followed are now known as the 1284 mass child massacrer, in which all 130 children were raped and savagely tortured and killed one by one, each viscously taped and recorded for the pipe pipers satisfaction, where a copy of each tape was sent to their corresponding parents, this was before their bodies turned up dangling from a tree and the bottom of the village, all 130 of them unrecognisable from decomposition and mutilation the pipe piper had inflicted.

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Marvin, was in the hospital on his death bed. The family called Marvin’s Preacher to be with him in his final moments. As the Preacher stood by the bed, Marvin’s condition seemed to deteriorate, and Marvin motioned for someone to quickly pass him a pen and paper. The Preacher quickly got a pen and paper and lovingly handed it to Marvin. But before he had a chance to read the note, Marvin died. The Preacher feeling that now wasn’t the right time to read it put the note in his jacket pocket. It was at the funeral while speaking that the Preacher suddenly remembered the note. Reaching deep into his pocket the Preacher said “and you know what, I suddenly remembered that right before Marvin died he handed me a note, and knowing Marvin I’m sure it was something inspiring that we can all gain from. With that introduction the Preacher ripped out the note and opened it. The note said “HEY, YOU ARE STANDING ON MY OXYGEN TUBE!”

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How do you dance to the black eyed peas? You don't you listen

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Guess what? I like trains.

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"The hills are alive..." Impossible, hills can never be alive.

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Whats worst than biting into an apple and finding a worm? Being stabbed.

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Lil' Johnny was happily swinging on the swings when all of a sudden...... ==]::::> ==]::::> ==]::::> ==]::::> ==]::::> ==]::::> FLYING DAGGERS!!!

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A black man walks into a store with a gun. He is a policeman bringing in a murder weapon as part of his investigation.

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what is meaningless and not fun at all? that joke

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There were two busses. The one was red, the other one went to France.

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Why did the chicken taunt the opposing team? To get to the other side.

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A man says to a boy. I bet you I can jump over that mountain. The boy wins the bet because it is a physical impossibility to jump over a mountain.

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Why do people on here submit anti-jokes involving children getting raped or killed? Because the people on this website are sadists. =/

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why can't James swim at 2010 summer ? because james died at 2009

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Sometimes I question my sanity... Occasionally it replies.

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What do you call a dinosaur that wears a cowboy hat and boots? It depends on what his name is.

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What did the Mexican Have for Thanksgiving Dinner? A Turkey you racist!

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what do you call 10 mexicans standing in a line? It's probably a lunch line for a taco vendor. And even this is just a coincidence. Everybody loves tacos.

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Q:Whats worse than you touching yourself at night A: The holocaust

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Roses are red, bikers are blur.....I love you ( drunk texting )

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What's woman spelled backwards? Sandwich-maker.

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I ran in to Hitler. "Hey, Hitler, what's up?" I asked. "Well, this time I am going to kill 6 million Jews and 2 clowns." "Two clowns?" I ask. "Why two clowns?" "See!" He exclaimed. "No one cares about the Jews!"

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sometimes when im bored i dress in white pour water on the ground and roll around in it and pretend im a papertowel

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Two penguins are sitting in the bathtub, the first one says to the second one "pass the soap." The other penguin says," what do I look like a radio?"

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

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The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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