Why did Suzie fall off the swing? Not because she had no arms, but because she just had no hands.

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You're always working, why don't you spend some time with your daughter? be a good father. But i already am. We're sleeping together while you work every night.

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you know why they're called ear wigs, right? cause they go in your ears! then they wig out? no, they kill you.

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Knock, Knock Who's there? Anti-Joke Delivery Service. Oh, just leave it by the door.

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Roses are red violets are blue your dads got hair what happened to you

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What did the farmer say when he lost his tractor? Where's my tractor?

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What is the difference between a duck and a cow? One is an aquatic fowl and the other is a farmland mammal.

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What's the difference between a black man and a white man? Their skin color.

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what's the best way to eat a dead baby? stewed into chili with jalepeno cheddar corn bread on the side

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Q: What is the answer to 255 x 23? A: A number!

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What did the guy who dropped his iPhone do? He went out and bought a knew one.

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Why was it okay for the people in the hospital to laugh at the patient with narcolepsy? It wasn't. The patients were treated due to moral obligations. But the doctors that laughed had either been fired or warned, depending on if there were previous reports of exploitation of patients.

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A man walks in to a bar, Has a drink, and leaves.

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Five people all from different backgrounds get in a car and nobody get's raped.

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you go up your hole down your hole between your hole and you rock and roll

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taking out the trash... at night

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What do you call 5,000 black people at the bottom of the ocean? A large quantity of African Americans who drowned to their death in the sea.

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How do you make a little boy get off a swing? You are an adult and perhaps it is inappropriate for you to be on a swing, especially when it is already occupied by a child of the right age.

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What do you call a black guy driving a plane? A pilot.

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what do you give a little girl with no legs and no arms for christmas...................cancer

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Knock Knock. Who's there? Me. You who? Me.

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How many alzheimer's patients does it take to change a light bulb? To get to the other side

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How do you get an elephant in the fridge in three moves open the door, put it in, close the door How do you put an giraffe in the fridge in four moves open the door, take out the elephant, put the giraffe in, and close the door

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Roses are Red Violets are Purple Not blue

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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