Q. whats piggy called A. Patrick gearthey

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Why did the corpse come to life? Because number 5 is alive!

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How many squirrels does it take to drive a refrigerator 10 quarts per elephant? Vanilla Cake

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Two guys walk into a bar; A Mexican and a Canadian. The Mexican guy says "Bartender, give me a 2 shots of Tequila, por favor". The Canadian guy says "Bartender, give me a shot of Club and a Molson, eh". They continue to drink until neither can feel the crippling pain of their mundane lives - then they each leave the bar, walk home and sleep alone.

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Knock-knock. Who's there? Doorbell repairman. ym

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Q: What was Steve Jobs' last words before he died? A: I Think i might die.

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Finn Davidson is cool, no he's not, yes he is

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What happened to the seal that walked into the zoo? Well nothing because seals can't walk.

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What do you call a person rolling down a hill, in a burning car, with a pack of wolves running after him? DEAD!

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knock knock

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Q: Why don't people like me? A: Because I smell bad and I give off a creepy vibe

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breasts

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so your skydiving in the ocean and one of you bedroom windows break. how many bloodstains does it take to paint a peice of bread covered in goat milk? the answer is D. 2731 books on cannabalism

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Have you seen Stevie Wonder's new piano? Neither has he...

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What was so sad about the white woman who dropped her Starbucks? It fell on her baby in a nearby stroller giving it third degree burns, disfiguring its face.

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One day a child goes to the doctor and says, "it hurts when do this" as he pokes his throat. The doctor, after several well-performed deep tissue testing, diagnosed the child with stage four esophageal cancer. The child cried himself to sleep that night.

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Why did the waiter lose his job? Because he was a fish

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Your momma is so stupid Her iq must be below 50

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Why did the chicken cross the road To get to the gay guys house Knock knock Who is there The chicken!!!!!!

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Q: What do you call a man with no arms and no legs in the water? A: Bob.

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Roses are Red, Violets are blue, Some jokes rhyme, But this one doesn't

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Why did Suzie fall off the swing? Because she has no arms. Knock knock! Who's there? Not Suzie

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why do elephants eat peanuts? so they can save the wrappers for valuble prizes.

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Knock Knock Whos there? It's me your mom you dumbass and let me in

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops