What do you get when you cross 3 men and a chainsaw? Answer: 2 and a half men

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I have aids

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Q:what did the 14 year old girl from Tennessee say to her dad when she lost her virginity? A: Get off of me

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What is an Indian's favourite country? North Currya

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your mumma so fat she ate a horse and she still had room for dinner

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Where's my tractor?

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Where did the boy go after the explosion? Everywhere

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Susan boyle has a belly button, Simon has a belly button, Because its only normal.

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Why wasn't the black man allowed on the golf course? Because a wealthy business man had rented out the entire course for a very important international investor.

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What's brown and sticky? The stuff that comes out of your anus

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What did the blonde say to the chicken? mmm, delicious

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Why are ther so many black people in the NBA? Because culturally Basketball is a very popular sport among a lot of African Americans, thus providing a lot of African Amercans to play Basketball professionally

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why is my phone broken i dropped it

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Why did the girl fall out of the swing? She had no arms.

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At the time my grandfather came round to visit, what was happening in Australia? A giant spider was giving birth.

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A Boy Walks Up To A Frog At the Bus Stop And Says, “Why Are You So Upset?” And The Frog Replied, “I’m Waiting For The Bus Because My Car Just Got TOAD!”

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A man is shipwrecked on a desert island. One day, he finds an old lamp. When he rubs it, a genie appears. The genie says, "You have freed me. As a reward, I will grant you three wishes." The man smacks himself in the face and mutters, "Oh god, I'm seeing genies now. I must be delirious from lack of food and water." Several hours later, he dies.

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Why couldn't Sally climb up the ladder? Because she was a paraplegic.

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Knock knock. Who's there? Orange. Orange who? Knock knock. Who's there? Orange. Orange who? Knock Knock. Who's there? Orange. Our experimental treatment for Anterograde amnesia has failed. I will inform your family.

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Daisies are green, poppies are white, I have a headache.

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How to you get a clown off a swing? You shoot it in the face.

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In the weeks following the original release of Die Hard, reports sprung up across the nation of impressionable boys overdosing while masturbating.

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Roses are dead. Violets are dead. I'm a bad gardener.

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Doctor, doctor, it hurts when I hit my head with a hammer!! Dont hit your head with a hammer anymore.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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