Why does Rupert The Bear wear checkered trousers? Because he's a twat.

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What's the difference between victims of Brady and Hindley and a pile of dead babies? Some were born dead and the others were raped then killed.

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What's clear and smells like alcohol? Probably alcohol, genius.

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Why was the fat guy sad? his daughter is slowly dying of anorexia why was the fat guy sad? his daughter was raped by a giant panda bear

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"what happened to the man that was walking along the cliff" he was found the next day dead with a seagull on his head.

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do you currently smoke? i hope not.

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Fox News

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Wanna hear a joke? Twilight

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A black guy, a priest, and a rabbi all walk into a bar. They order water and chat about life.

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Question: How did the little girl die Answer: cancer and AIDS

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What does Helen Keller order at McDonalds? Food.

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I wife my butt after I poop. I poop out of my penis.

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Life is like swimming. When you drown you die.

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What's worse than a dead baby in a trash can? A dead baby in 10 trash cans.

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what sad about 4 mexican dieing in a car crash??? My car

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This is a joke only for males: Walk into any semi busy public restroom. Stand at the urinal for about 30 seconds to a minute acting as though you cannot find your penis. Make sure you have the attention of at least 2 other urinators and then exclaim quite loudly "I can't find it!" then walk out.

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A man is walking in the desert, alone and lost, when suddenly he finds a lamp. The man picks up the lamp and to his surprise, a genie bursts out of the lamp ! The genie says to the man: "Thank you, kind man! You have freed me from this prison I have been in for a million years. I am in your dept and will grant you three wishes." The man replies: "Wow, you've been in there for a million years and all you have to give me are three wishes?" The genie was really sad to hear of the man's lack of appreciation and flew away, leaving the man. The man eventually died of starvation and dehydration.

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Are you from Tennessee? Cause my uncle grew up there and I was wondering if you knew him.

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The past the present and the future walk into a bar it made no logical sense that three things that will always contradict each other exist with each other and can walk into a bar without limbs or being alive it wasn't tense it made no sense

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An Englishman, Irishman, and Jew walk into a bar. Steven Spielberg is a Jew.

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A plane carrying an Englishman, an Irishman, and a Scotsman is destined to crash unless some weight is lost. First they drop the spare engine, but there is still too much weight. Then they drop the luggage, but still there is too much weight. All three men then jump out. The plane crashes anyway.

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your sister has 1 boob thats funny

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what do you tell a woman with one black eye? "sorry about that wild ball, you played a fantastic softball game otherwise"

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A cat walks by a chineese buffet, the owner kindly puts food and water outside the door so it doesnt die

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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