How do you stop a clown from laughing? Hit him in the face with an ax.

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You wanna see my secret freckle? NO! How about my butt? What!!!!!!!

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Why did the chicken cross the road?... To get to the other side.

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Why does the man leave the store, with two lemons in his shopping bag? Because lemons happened to be one of the items of food he had purchased.

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I hate chocolate. I hate it so much. It sickens me. The only thing I hate more than chocolate is people that like chocolate. I hate them even more. Do you know what happened to the last person I met that liked chocolate? NOTHING

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Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? Because he died. Why did the elephant fall out of the tree? Because he was to fat. Why did the snake fall out of the tree? I don't know everything, Bitch!

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Knock Knock! Who's there? ....Mrs Murray silently returned to her armchair, a single tear rolling down her weathered cheek. Her lonely existence deepened, as she realised the gang of boys had fooled her again.

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Q: What do sleeping pills and coffee have in common? A: Absolutely nothing

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Why couldn't the white child dunk the basketball? His legs were amputated and he has been confined to a wheelchair.

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Why did the woman stop making a sandwich for her husband? Because he's dead.

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A baby seal walks into a club.

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A blonde was very smart, and nobody made fun of her when she sometimes made small mistakes like every other person regardless of hair color.

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Q: What do you call a cow with no legs? A: Lunch.

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What did the Dementia sufferer get for Christmas?

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Q: what did the man with a broken jaw say? A: nnamkkiuuiriwojjkmgfmls!!!!

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There is no joke here, stop reading.

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meatspin.fr

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There was a man who entered a local paper's pun contest. He sent in ten different puns. He won.

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Three men are walking down the street to buy groceries. They then take a left and continue walking towards the store.

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Where did Susie go during the bombing? EVERYWHERE

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Why couldn't the girl climb out of the pool? She drowned

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If I threw a regular snowball at a random snowman, would my action directly result in the increase of the snowman's size or would it rather have caused to snowball to become substantially larger in succession? Only a few people could answer that question. Not all of us are actually philosophy aficionados after all.

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I went to Nebraska and saw a dead squirrel

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A man walks into a sporting goods store and pulls out a gun. Then he returns it and leaves.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops