Why do people poke people on facebook? Because they have no friends and will die alone

thumb_up thumb_down +26

What would you do for a Klondike Bar? I would probably spend somewhere under 3 dollars at a store, but only if somebody else drives me. I really don't want to drive, not in this gas shortage. You know what...forget it, Klondike Bars make my teeth hurt due to my sensitive teeth problem. I know I should get that sensitive teeth tooth paste, but I always forget when at the store.

thumb_up thumb_down +26

What is worse than a person eating cereal? A black person eating white children.

thumb_up thumb_down +26

Q: What's worse than biting into an apple and finding a worm? A: Being caught by the store manager, arrested, convicted, and thrown into jail for petty theft and then getting anally raped for the next 3 months all because you wanted to check an apple without paying for it.

thumb_up thumb_down +26

Why did Hayden Bryant walk down the street? Because he can, dont doubt Hayden Bryant.

thumb_up thumb_down +24

What's the best way to cross the road? Ideally with your feet and legs because disabled people usually don't recommend their unfortunate state of affairs. However there are other alternatives which may or may not be better than common or garden walking, such as crane hire - crossing in a crane bucket in a safe spot; chauffer driven limos, which don't do the straight, direct route, generally; and being carried on a replica of Cleopatra's carry couch (but with modern suspension, unless you prefer the up and down motion).

thumb_up thumb_down +24

You can pick you're friends, you can pick you're nose, but you can't run over a pedestrian.

thumb_up thumb_down +24

What's the only thing more horrible than trash can full of dead babies? A live one at the bottom. What's more horrible than that? He has to eat his way out. What's more horrible than that? He goes back for more. What's more horrible than that? This all took place in my garage while I was watching.

thumb_up thumb_down +24

Why do black people eat at KFC? Because KFC serves good food at reasonable prices.

thumb_up thumb_down +24

What do you call a Jew picking up a quarter on the street? A very nice man because a homeless man just dropped that and he was trying to return it. Rob W

thumb_up thumb_down +24

Q: What is the difference between a Porsche and a pile of dead babies? A: I don't have a Porsche in my garage.

thumb_up thumb_down +24

Why did the plane crash? Because the pilot was a loaf of bread!

thumb_up thumb_down +24

Black people

thumb_up thumb_down +24

I went to Nebraska and saw a dead squirrel

thumb_up thumb_down +24

Q: How do you break into your own house? A:You don't....thats ridiculous(:

thumb_up thumb_down +22

whats worse than being late to school haveing your family killed by an angry peice of toast

thumb_up thumb_down +22

Are yu mad Twinkle twinkle little star if yu don't shut up I'm gonna hit you with my freaking car

thumb_up thumb_down +22

"What would you do if i gave you a million dollars?" "I would scream and jump up and down? Are you really gonna give me a million dollars?" "No i just wanted to see what you would have said, that's all"

thumb_up thumb_down +22

In Soviet Russia, Stalin kills you

thumb_up thumb_down +22

What do a fish and a frog have in common? They can both live in water. Its a well known fact.

thumb_up thumb_down +22

Q. Why was six afraid of seven? A. Because seven raped a three year-old child.

thumb_up thumb_down +22

Roses are red Violets are violet Don't know why people are saying they're blue

thumb_up thumb_down +22

Why did the women leave the kitchen? Because the The husband told her to...

thumb_up thumb_down +22

Knock knock. Who's there? Frank. Frank who? Cut the shit, I'm being chased by a tiger!

thumb_up thumb_down +22

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops