What's red and screams? A peeled baby in a bag of salt.

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what did the lawyer say to the other lawyer? Were both lawyers!

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What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? Dying unloved.

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if you watched wife-swap years ago, you'll remember that one family that bought anything they could because they didnt have to pay till 12-21-12 because they thought the world would end LOL FUN FAMILY NOW HUH

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What's the difference between a bird and a pool table? Both of them fly, except for the pool table.

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Hey

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What's the difference between a baby and a textbook? You throw a textbook at the wall with TWO hands.

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Your mom is so fat that she has diabetes and if she does not stick to her medical diet, her foot will be removed, but she started binge eating because of you in the first place, and if you don't straighten our your life, you will inadvertently be the cause of your mothers death.

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Q: What do you call a person up to their elbows in a horse's ass? A: An Amish auto mechanic. (this gem brought to you by Designated Dale)

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Why did you loose the basketball game? Because they scored more points than us.

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Knock Knock Who's there? Knock Knock I said, who's there? KNOCK KNOCK OH MY GOD, WHO IS IT??? Yes, we have your daughter here, she was caught doing drugs on school property.

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who is gay for wild ones- Ryan Mcgggguigan

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Why couldn't the chicken cross the road? It had no legs.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Okay, seriously I'm done. I try to make a joke but I don't think I can do it anymore. I'm not funny I'm just a little coward who offers nothing to life. I should just kill myself. Fuck this joke, fuck you.

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why can't helen keller drive? Because she is deaf and blind.

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You know what's catchy? A cold

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An owl and a squirrel were sitting on a tree branch. An acorn fell on the squirrel's head and surprised, the owl moved its head 3.276 degrees to the right. The squirrel apologized for the inconvenience, but the owl would not listen, so flew off to buy a ferry to help children with terminal illnesses get to school.

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What do people say when a dyslesic person scores a goal in soccer good job that was a nice goal

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Roses are red Violets are red The grass is red OH MY GOD, THERE'S BLOOD EVERYWHERE!!!

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Friend's are like pinguins, they both die when you stab them in the heart.

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The world ends and everyone dies exept for a laywer

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Mitt Romney

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Q: what is socialism? A: a terrible system

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Q: Why wouldn't the other kids play with Timmy at recess? A: Because he was a burn victim and had no face.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops