What's pink fluff? Pink fluff. What's blue fluff? Pink fluff holding it's breath. What's red fluff? Angry pink fluff. Ask me if I'm a truck. Are you a tr-- No. What's green and has wheels? Grass. I was just lying about the wheels. What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? Finding half a worm in your apple, 'cause the other half's in your mouth. What's worse than finding half a worm in your apple? Angry pink fluff. What's worse than angry pink fluff? The holocaust. That's not funny. Stop laughing.

What did the lawyer say to the doctor? - Could you please take a look at my neck it has been hurting there for several weeks now.

What did the elephant say to the other elephant? We're both elephants!

Man #1:Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? Man #2: I don't know Man #1: Because he died. Why did the second monkey fall out of the tree? Man #2: Because he died? Man #1: Yep. Why did the third monkey fall out of the tree? Man #2: Really? Come on, I've already answered your stupid question. Man #1: JUST ANSWER! Man #2: Fine, because he died. Man #1: No, peer pressure. Duh. Man #2 promplty punches Man #1 in the face and continues about his buisness.

the girl crossed a road to shoot a black van. she shot the sherrif.

"Whats your favorite number?" "9." "Is it because thats your jersey number." "Thats my jersey number?"

What made the lady dance? Bandz!

Q: What genre is the bible? A: Si-fi

What do you call a man that's very angry? A Very Angry Man.

Refrigerator

roses are red, violets are blue i couldnt spend one night without you

42, that is all

A black guy walks into his bar. So he pays his tab and couldn't have been more coureious.

How do you drown a fish? You don't...

Why did the batmobile lose a wheel? The joker was raping robin too hard

What do you call a Muslim flying a plane? A pilot for Arabian Air, idiot. What were you thinking?

When I exited the hospital one day, I spotted a sign saying "Come back soon!" Soon afterwards I saw people protesting to ban dihydrogen monoxide. The next day on tv I saw an ad for a solar powered lightbulb. Then I saw a Gun control poster. I cried, this being the dumbest thing I had seen yet, and the world was certainly doomed due to humanity's general stupidity. I saw a chicken crossing a packed road. Why did the chicken feel the urge to cross the road?

What do you call five black guys surrounding one white guy who bosses them around? Whatever his name is.

People Order Our Patties

Why does Santa Clause say Ho Ho Ho? He has Tuberculosis.

Why did the banana rot? Because it didn't have any gills.

Dad, why are we Swedish? Because antilopes and the butterfly effect son.

A man walks into a bar and says Ouch.

What did your mom make me for Christmas... ...An apple pie because she is a very nice lady

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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