What happens when you shoot a bear and you kill it? It dies.

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Wanna hear a bathroom joke? YOU TRYIN' TO KILL US?!?

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How did the baby cross the road? .......... It was stapled to the chicken.

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A handless Asian boy was riding his bike through the park with some friends. One of his friends puts his arms in the air and yells "Look! No hands!" The handless boy rides his bike home, crying and thinking about how one day he would like to say, "Look! No hands!" without people getting nauseous.

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Q. how do you get 50 babies into a bowl? A. blender Q. how do you get them out of the bowl? A. Doritos

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What happend to the man who walked into a forrest? He got raped by a giant vicious mutant spider

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, I stole all your jokes, I stole this one too.

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Yo mama is so nasty she won't take a shower till she is dead you idiot says the boy she won't die she has twenty thousand live

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Why are pineapples yellow? 82, piano, bomb, lamp!

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a man walks into a bar the bar tender says why the long face? i just walked into a bar

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Two men are walking in a forest And they find this deep whole, so they spit in it to see how deep it but they here nothing So they throw a rock in and still hear nothing Them they find this old tramission and throw that in. A couple second later the goat comes running by and jumps in the whole A couple minutes pass and an old farmer walks up and asks if they had seen his goat and they replied" yea it just ran and jumped into that whole. The farmer says "that's weird considering I had him tied up to an old tramission

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What do you call a tennis match between Helen Keller and Stevie Wonder? An anachronistic hypothetical sporting event that would never happen.

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Spongebob: Patrick! Can you hear me? Patrick: No, it's too dark.

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Do you know who's gay? Homosexuals.

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Pigs have the emotional capacity of a five year old think about that next time you have to dissect one in biology

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how many times did lucy's mom drop her baby on its head? none, her mom died giving birth.....

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how do you make a plumber sad? tell him to pull up his pants

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Q. What do black people, Asians, and Irishmen call their moms? A. "Mom"

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can i have 10 pounds to go to the cinema?

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what's worse than a pile of dead babies? a pile of dead babies with a live one at the bottom eating its way out.

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A: you have a strong arm. B: yea i work ou- A: you can master bate a whale.

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what does hi = good by cause person doesn't like you.

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Two babies are playing in a sand box.. They both start crying because they get sand in their eyes

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Why did the constipated man go to the bathroom? To intentionally throw up; he has an eating disorder.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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