What did the fat guy say to the skinny guy? You're skinny

thumb_up thumb_down -28

Pete and Repeat were in a boat, Pete jumped out. Repeat was concerned-not only because his name was typically used as a verb and not something parents normally name a baby, but about why Pete would jump out of the boat? Pete wondered what to do next-should he jump in and see if Pete is okay? He also wondered if he should he change his name to Kevin.

thumb_up thumb_down -28

Why did the black man break up with his white girlfriend? Because he didn't love her anymore.

thumb_up thumb_down -28

why did mad is on home s walk becuaes a isnt a number

thumb_up thumb_down -28

What did Facebook say to Twitter, and twitter to blogg ant blogg to youtube? nothing. They cant talk..

thumb_up thumb_down -28

Paper shield.

thumb_up thumb_down -28

I agree

thumb_up thumb_down -30

Why did Michael dye. Because he was dyslexic and a plain fell on his noggin.

thumb_up thumb_down -30

what did the boy with no arms or legs get for christmas? cancer

thumb_up thumb_down -30

Yeah I was beginning to enjoy that as well, but I used "timed hypnosis" I have not seen it been coined elsewhere yet, not that I learn hypnosis anymore, I kinda teach it covertly to whoever I believe can use it responsively. "Timed hypnosis" is not really based upon a set amount of time after all time is relative, and our subconcious does know that and the subconcius understands that we did not invent time just because we made some fucking dials spin around" Now, timed hypnosis is based on a purpose, for example: "I will go into a trance until I am done teaching my new buddy how covert hypnosis works and teach her to use it subconciously" But now I made you aware of that, so you can use it consciously as well, the real magic here is that the subconcious is so much more efficient and powerful than the conscious mind that it would not even be neccesary to have a concious mind, except for one thing.

thumb_up thumb_down -30

a boy jumps off a building why? because he's afraid of heights

thumb_up thumb_down -30

Why did the black man go through the window of the house? He left his keys inside

thumb_up thumb_down -30

Three guys at the beach decided to bet on who could swim the farthest. The first guy, could not swim so he lost. The second guy got a cramp right away. The third one swam far away into the distance, and was not seen or heard on for days... Three weeks later his corpse was found floating by the shore. The other two died out of guilt.

thumb_up thumb_down -30

...............................................................hi

thumb_up thumb_down -30

"So can we take the rest of the schoolday off?" the students asked. The teacher then asked: "Why?" The students explained: "Because some of us live far away and it's impossible to get through the masses of snow, especially if the snowfall continues like this." "Well, I can't give you time off, because the principal haven't said it has snowed enough just yet." he responded.

thumb_up thumb_down -32

Two Mexicans walk into a bar, The bartender says your hired.

thumb_up thumb_down -32

Why did Martian Luther King climb the mountain? Because there was a KFC on top

thumb_up thumb_down -32

Where can I find a good Prostitute? Your Parents House.

thumb_up thumb_down -32

Miss Hoolie: Hello, PC Plum. What's the story in Balamory? PC Plum: I'm arresting you for the sexual molestation of twenty children.

thumb_up thumb_down -32

Awesome! I've just received my free minecraft giftcode! >> minecraftnow.us <

thumb_up thumb_down -32

what do you do with a drunken sailor? take him back to port because he's not in a right state of mind to be on board a moving vessel

thumb_up thumb_down -32

Cum on guys....gay jokes are mean

thumb_up thumb_down -32

im in stttttttttiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiittttttttttttttttttccccccccccccchhhhhhhhhhhhhheeeeeeeeeeeeeeeesssssssssssss

thumb_up thumb_down -32

Whats In My Trash? Bears

thumb_up thumb_down -32

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops