What did one Lacrosse player say to the other? Let's touch shafts

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Roses are Verbotten Violets are Verbotten Anti-jokes is Verbotten Everything is Verbotten boats aren't Verbotten

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Why was the turtle blue? He wasn't you are color blind.

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What goes in dry and comes out wet Gum

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What's the difference between a pizza and a Jew? A pizza doesn't scream when you put it in the oven.

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how do you confuse a blond? put them in a circle room and tell them to sit in the corner

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this kid named terry was sitting in computer class then he got punched in the face

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version 2 knock knock, whose there FU CK FU CK who FU CK YOU

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Enough with the "whats worse than ... "jokes! They are getting old and have a millon different possible answers. I am aware that this is not a joke but thumbs up if you aggree with.

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Ask me if I'm a tree. Are you a tree? Yes.

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When I exited the hospital one day, I spotted a sign saying "Come back soon!" Soon afterwards I saw people protesting to ban dihydrogen monoxide. The next day on tv I saw an ad for a solar powered lightbulb. Then I saw a Gun control poster. I cried, this being the dumbest thing I had seen yet, and the world was certainly doomed due to humanity's general stupidity. I saw a chicken crossing a packed road. Why did the chicken feel the urge to cross the road?

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What is the difference between 1000 dead babies and a Cadillac? I don't have a Cadillac in my garage.

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Two fish are in a tank. The first one says, "How the heck do I drive this thing!".

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Q: Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? A1: he was shot. A2: he died A3: the forest was being cut down and he got into a machine and was shredded to pieces A4: he fell asleep

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A blond, burnette, and red head walk into a bar. They sit together and enjoy a few drinks while catching up on eachother's lives.

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you put the chevy to the levy when your pants fell heave diarea

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why did the one armed, bearded man, in a wheelchair go to the mall ? He wished to purchase yogurt and Tiger woods 2007 for the ps2

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Q: How did the blonde girl get into Harvard? A: hard work, dedication, and a perfect SAT score.

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Why is a cat in the desert like Christmas? Because Egypt is a country of deserts, the Egyptians had cats and Jesus, Mary and Joseph escaped to Egypt in the Christmas story before Herod carried out his massacre in Bethlehem on baby boys of under two years old.

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Want to hear a funny story? So, these to kids have cancer...

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Whats worse than having sex with your hot cousin? Not having sex with your hot cousin...

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Knock, Knock, Who's there? The IRS.

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, I am Jack Bauer, Where is the nuke?

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Two Jews walk into a bar. They have a lengthy discussion regarding the hardships their people have suffered throughout history. Eventually, the subject changes to which coffee franchise has the best blend. A clear, concise decision is never reached. They then are asked to leave the bar, as they have not ordered any drinks and the bar is for paying customers only.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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