What is green, brown, has four legs and would kill you if it fell on you from out of a tree? A pool table

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i used to think i had the coolest secret handshake with helen keller. then i realized she was talking sh*t about me

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Why did the robber wear a mask? Because he had eczema.

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What's the difference between a rock and a baby? You can't have sex with the rock.

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I couldnt remember who Rhiana used to date. Then it hit me.

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Q. What did the wierd kid get for christmas A. A Pokemon diamond edition

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How are a black man, a hispanic man, and a chinese man similar? Believe it or not they all love cantaloupe!

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why did the Mexican shoot himself? because his wife miscarried, hung herself, and his oldest brother had cancer. also when he was 5, his parents died in a car accident, leaving his abusive uncle to care for him. he also had erectile dysfunction which caused him severe pain. did i mention he was an illegal, homeless immigrant who was addicted to methamphedimine and owed several million dollars to a man who repeatedly raped him anally? he was.

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What did the parakeet say to the grapefruit? Nothing. Parakeets can't speak.

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2 nuns were in a bathtub. One says to the other "Could you pass me the soap please?" The other replies, "What do you think I am, a radio?"

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Two muffins are in an oven one of them says "wow it's hot in here" The other muffin says "Ah a talking muffin"

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what happened to the cripple after he got in a wheel chair? cancer of the eye

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Do gingers have souls ? No, Gingers are a myth made up in the 13th centuary to scare little kids.

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If there's something strange in the neighborhood, who you gonna call? The police, because it's obviously a darky that's up to no good.

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What is a Will And Dan put together A WillDan HAHAHAHAHA

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What's the difference between a rabbit and a Rabbi? Rabbits are of the family Leporidea, whereas Rabbi's are Jewish.

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yo mamas so fat whenever she wears a pink bathing suit people say "look at that fat lady wearing a pink bathing suit!

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Why couldn't the elephant ride the bike? Because it didn't have a thumb to ring the bell!

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What does a Jew do when he finds money on the street? He picks it up and is probably happy it was there.

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What do you call a car with a sunroof? A car.

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Why can't Helen Keller drive? She is dead, and thereby lacks the necessary motor control.

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The grandfather's grandson said, "They charged me $10 just for a cup of coffee!" The grandfather said, "They charged me with bayonets."

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Q: Why did the man cross the road? A: Cause he felt like it.

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knock knock? who's there? ted? ted who? stop f***ing around, you got cancer.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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