The itsy bitsy spider climbed up the water spout. Heavy rain came down and killed him.

A new family have moved in next to me. They have three little kids and they've challenged me to a water fight in the back yard, so I'm just writing this while I'm waiting for the kettle to boil

A bartender walks into the man and the bar said nothing because it was inanimate.

Why did the chicken cross the road? To get to the other side which would be a incontrovertible (obvious) decision.

Roses are red, Violets are violet.

How do you call two black men on the moon? Astronauts.

Knock Knock Knock Knock Knock Knock Knock Knock Meanwhile in the basement...an elderly man, who lives a lone and whose children lead their own lives and dont have much time for him, lies on the ground unable to move after having falling down the stairs. He has been there for 2 days. He is frightened and confused, he hears someone knocking and his hopes perk up, he tries to call but due to lack of water his mouths is too dry to do so. He sobs in frustration. Knock Knock [Silence] The old man cries, aware of his fate.

Why did blink-182 get a record deal? Because they play quality punk rock.

Knock knock Who's there A girl scout A girl scout who? A girl scout trying to sell cookies to support her alcoholic parents who beat her

my gave me a game i said thank you

What's blue, cold and makes people cry? A dead baby

What would happen if you put a marshmellow in a tractor Because 7, 8, 9

Why did the black man kill his girlfriend? Because it was his mom!

Q: Why was Luigi sad? A: Because he entered the Twilight Zone.

Wanna hear something funny? David is addicted to mw3 like the other 3 million people!

What do you call an Arabic man flying a plane? A Pilot.

Nature is filled with wondrous things. No really, this isn't a joke.

Dont read this joke

A: Knock Knock B: ...

What's so sad about a bus with mentally handicapped children falling off a cliff? There was one empty seat.

Why was the little boy crying? Because his older brother was forcing him to pee on an electrical socket.

Okay, yeah red, but you wont ever get to see it because you have gone stale.

What happens when a super saiyan eats a fully grown pineapple? hehe xd

What's so funny about losing the game? Nothing.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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