purple pickles

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What's worse than an explosion? A nuclear explosion.

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A woman walks into a bar.

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A black man walks up to a white man, and the black man says YO DIGGITY DAWG WASSAP FO DRIZZLE PLAYA BEEP BOBOTY BOP. And the white man stands there, confused as to what the black man said.

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How do you keep a secret? Kill yourself.

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Why did Sally get hit with a fridge? Because someone threw a fridge at Sally Why would someone throw a fridge at her? Because Sally has no arms

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Why did Sarah fall off the swing? She had no arms. Knock. Knock. Whos there? Not Sarah.

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NeroChan, I have said nothing to you, that you have not taught me, if nothing else you have indirectly inspired yourself, you will get back on your feet, you just need to take one step at the time, I know how ambitious you are, but you always focused on helping others, hiding, seeing yourself as a sinking ship, trying to help as many as possible before you pass away. We can work trough this together, it is easy to figure out that you are trying to protect others from what you feel that you have become, something that cannot be repaired, something that was never meant to be fixed, but to be used until it had no more to give.

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Mom I am so sorry I molested you yesterday. Im not your mom! Phew, wanna go out?

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Knock knock? Who is there? Nobody. Those were noises coming from your head.

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What did the boy say to the ghost wearing a banana outfit? Holy crap! A ghost!

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What do an elephant and a grape have in common? They're both purple... except for the elephant.

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once there where 3 guys on a beach. they found a bottle and a fetis came out.. later they found out 2 of the 3 had cancer and the 3rd was a vegetable.

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What's worse than no christmas? Taking a chainsaw to the face.

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Why did the black 10 year old miss school? Because his grandmother just had a severe heart attack and the whole family is coming in to visit and pay their last respects.

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Why was little georgia afraid of the tea cup ? Because she was tripping over the holocaust.

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that awkward moment when your teachers a duck

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How many lightbulbs does it take to screw in a dyslexic men? 25

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A doctor tells a woman he needs to take her rectal temperature. The woman tells the doctor "That's not my rectum." The doctor promptly apologizes and conducts the rest of the check up.

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The rabbit owns a small business and has trouble getting a loan.

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What is the worst gift a child can get? a gift

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Why did the 14 year old girl have sex? Because she's in love with her boyfriend and that's how she expresses it.

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What would Walt Disney be if he were still alive today? Still anti-semetic

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There were 3 women, a blonde, a brunette, and a redhead. They were driving with a gorilla when suddenly the car crashed. All the women died but only the gorilla survived. The police investigated with the gorilla and did some simple sign language. The police, using hand motions, asked the gorilla what each individual female was doing before the car crashed. The gorilla ran away for reasons unknown.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops