Why did the black man go to church? Because his father died.

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What did the ice cream man ask the little boy? Want some ice cream?

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Why do white people go to black people's yard sales? Because they know they sale good quality stuff -Travis

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How do you teach an asian baby to read? Enroll him in a good pre-school and practice regularly.

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why did the chicken cross the road? he didnt.. that kinda shit never happens

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Why did Winston Churchill cross the road? Grave robbery has become a huge problem lately in the United Kingdom.

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Friends are like potatoes. I don't have any potatoes.

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Why did the woman call 911? Fire.

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How can you tell if a woman is a man? If she has a penis

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What's the difference between a guitar and a fish? Fish are living organisms and guitars are instruments used for people's entertainment

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Q:What happened when Smokey the Bear was the one who started the forest fire? A: He got arrested just like you would have

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What's got eight legs and one eye? Two chairs and half a pigs head.

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What did Batman say to Robin before getting in the Batmobile? "Robin, please, get in the Batmobile

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What's brown and sticky? Vomit.

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A pink bird and a pink elephant was out flying. Then something happened.

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Why didn't the Irishman want to drink anymore? Because he wasn't thirsty.

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What do you call a smart blond? A golden retriever!

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Whats pink and screaming? a skinned baby in a bucket of vinegar+

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Imagine a scenario Add a Rhubarb Crumble into your scenario Add your mother and father sitting together watching the news in your scenario. Your scenario should take place in an old people's home Add an Olympic athlete doing the splits into your scenario If there were any crane-flies in your scenario, be sure to subtract them at once. Divide your scenario by two. Your scenario should now be a mental image of flying horses and a hippopotamus eating a large salmon mousse. There will be a pig tied to a pair of sunglasses.

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Why did the plane crash? Because the pilot was a loaf of bread

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What ended in the year 1970? 1969

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What's black, white & red all over? A cow in a slaughter house.

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this is a haiku i have no idea where i am going with .... this

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Q:how many ping-pong balls do you need te get a crocodile off of a slide ? A:none, because an engine doesn't have doors

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops