your mumma so fat she ate a horse and she still had room for dinner

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What did the boy with no arms or legs get for Christmas? A scholarship to a prestigious college that he did not deserve.

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why did the slytherin cross the road twice? ... because they are double-crossers.

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The good part of "Age" of Ultron? THANOS REIGNS! Disagree? Just leave the green thumb and fuck off!

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What's blue and smells like red paint. ............blue paint.

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What do you call a black man speeding away in a Ferrari. A wealthy man who is late for work.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? I doubt it thought much about this. The chicken is a simple animal, and i doubt its actions were spurred by any particular motivation.

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What did the girl get with no arms and no legs get for christmas? Cancer.

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A priest and rabbi walk into a bar, they order a few drinks, then call a cab to go home.

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what goes woof ? A dog.

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Why did the baby cross the road? Because it most likely saw a shiny object and wanted to play with it. Luckily there was no cars passing at the time but the parents should be more careful to keep thier child in sight and away from peril. That and the baby found a small piece of glass that could be harmful to it....

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Why did the first koala fall out of the tree? Because it was dead. Why did the second koala fall out of the tree? Because it was stapled to the first koala. Why did the third koala fall out of the tree? Peer pressure. Why did the boy fall off of his bike? He was hit by falling koalas.

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Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? Because it died! Why did the chicken fall out of the tree? Because it was stapled to the monkey!!

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A Jewish man answered his phone one day. The man on the line said he'd kill him and all his family. The Jewish man then hung up the phone and resumed his everyday life.

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Why was the little boy upset? An arson set fire to his house, leaving him nowhere to live.

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A boy has enough money to buy an xbox and a game, but when he reaches the store he is no longer able to buy an xbox and a game, how is this possible? He didnt really have enough money to buy an xbox and a game.

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Whats worse than a Jew Ben rike

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How do you know you're crazy? Consult the pink pheasent to your left

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why did the plane crash? because the pilot was a loaf of bread

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what do you call postman pat after he's retired? Pat.

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Why were the black man's balls so big He had testicular cancer

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What's the deal with brown?

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What has 4 black legs, a green back, and will kill you if it falls on you? A pool table.

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How do you kill 1000 Ethiopians? Push 1000 Ethiopians off a cliff

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops