who's that hot blonde at the disco? your mother.

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Justin's humor

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You know what is funny about r.ape? Nothing. It's horror

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If the red house is made out of red bricks, the yellow house is made out of yellow bricks, and the blue house is made out of blue bricks, what is the greenhouse made of? Ah, I see what you did there. You are expecting me to follow the sequence based on how each house is made out of bricks the same color as their title. However, I am one step ahead of you and I know that the greenhouse is made out of glass panels. But what if it were made out of green glass panels? Then, I suppose, the sequence could continue naturally yet we still have a problem of units - bricks vs. glass. Quite the dilemma we are facing.

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Why didn't the black man eat a packet of crisps? Because he didn't have any.

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Why does Nathan Rogers never get any pussy? Because goblins have small dicks

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A horse walks into the bar. The bartender asks "why the long face" Turns out the horse's family died that evening.

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What do you call a man with a spade in his head? An ambulance.

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Yo mama so fat - - That your dad left her, and it's tearing your family apart

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How do you kill an already dead man? You don't he's already dead.

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Where did Susie go during the explosion? On her knees to catch it.

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Q. If the early bird gets the worm, what does the early worm get? A. Eaten...

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Knock knock. Who's there? Banana. Knock knock Who's there? Banana. Knock knock Who's there? You're in-laws. Bet you wish I said banana

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What do you call a building full of black people Jail

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what do Jewish people and pizzas have in common? they enjoy parties

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If we had some ham, we could have ham and eggs; if we had some eggs.

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What do Austrailian cows say? Moo.

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What does a gay horse eat? Low-energy foods should only be fed to horses who are not regularly being worked and participating in high performance. According to the University of Kentucky's College of Agriculture, energy is vital to horses who need to perform their best as it aids many of the body's functions including muscle contraction, respiration and circulation. Only feed a low-energy diet to an idle horse and feed a high-energy diet to an older or sickly horse and to a working horse.

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why was the black man wearing a ski mask? he was skiing.

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What's spongy and smells of treacle? Treacle sponge

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Why did Joe wake up screaming? Because his wife cut off his penis.

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Ass ass ass ass ass ass ass ass ass ass...! I said "ass" a lot, sorry for the language

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Why was the mexican being lazy? Because he lead a very successful life and retired early and now can enjoy the luxury of the finer things in life.

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Q. What's the difference between a Mcdonalds employee and a gynecologist? A. They have different jobs.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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