Person 1: I have one question: What are those?!?!?!?!?! Person 2 : Their shoes you Dimwit. Person 1: (runs away crying) -by Mekkhi

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A man walks into a bar. He drinks.

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How much does a Polar Bear weigh? Approximately 500 lbs

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what did the little boy say when the teacher asked what he wanted to be when he grew up? Adolf Hitler

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Do you know what's impossible? A chink whos not smart.

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Steven Hawkin ran a marathon.

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Q: What does a baby and an old man have in common? A: They both pee in public

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Whats white and can't climb a tree? A refrigerator

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A man ate a lot of ice cream he had double bypass surgery 3 months later

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What did the circle say to the square? Ur a square

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What did Helen Keller say when she jumped off the cliff? ........………………………………….…………….........................................................................………………,………………...........................................................................………………………………….…………….........................................................................………………,………………...........................................................................………………………………….…………….........................................................................………………,………………...........................................................................………………………………….…………….........................................................................………………,………………..................................................................... .

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How many Legos can you stick up your nose? I'm sure its very painful and considered stupid so don't try it.

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Why did the Mexican stop mowing the family's lawn? Because he felt it was time for his son to learn some responsibility.

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Three baby seals walk into a club...

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why did jenny fall off the swing? because she had no arms Knock Knock Whos there? not jenny

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Why did the plane crash? Because the pilot was a loaf of bread.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Solely for our entertainment purposes.

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What is the longest sentence that a man knows? If it is used it in context, isn't round and the speaker attempts to quote the whole number - or at least all of it known to date, then any sentence involving the value of pi.

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A man walks into bar and orders a drink. The bartender says " Hey I saw a bunch of men coming in and out of your house while you were on vacation last week." The man replied " I know. That's because my wife is a prostitute."

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If a quiz is a quizical then what is a test? an Exam.

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What's the difference between the NBA and the WNBA? Nothing at all, except the WNBA is professional basketball players of the female sex.

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How do you address a gay, jewish, african male? You can't, as addressing a person would imply mailing them. And that would violate their human rights. As well, the cost of shipping a package of that size would be rather prohibitive

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A Blonde arives at the airport late, and misses her flight. The airline provides her with a complimentary ticket for a later flight and she departs on that.

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What did the robet say to the centipede? Stop being a centipede. Its funny cuase the robot had no arms.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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