What did the woman find when she got home from the post office? Her son's corpse hanging from a clothes hanger. She was an abusive mom, and he killed himself.

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how long is a peice of string howeverlong you want to make it

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Why was the blind man bored? - He was in a coma

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Q: A blonde, a red-head, and a brunette all jump off the bridge at the same time. Who hits the ground first? A: As stated by Sir Isaac Newton's third law of gravitation, all three fall to their deaths at the exact same time because the velocity of a falling object is unaffected by the mass of that object... or their hair colour. Idiot.

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Why did the armadillo fall off the cliff?

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Jack and Jill went up the hill, to fetch a pail of water. Jack fell down and broke his crown, and Jill came tumbling after. Up Jack got, and home did trot, as fast as he could caper, to old Dame Dob, who proceeded to get Jill convicted of attempted murder, as well as several millions of dollars for pain and suffering.

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Whats red and smells like blue paint? Red paint

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a fat old hobo named da'shovant'e ate a bucket of fried chicken then killed a little girl named poopface McFergusen

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What's black and white and red all over? A pile of dead, mixed-race babies.

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whats the one about not giving a crap? oh yea this one

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What happened to the cat that fell in the bath? It jumped out feeling cold and embarrassed.

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How many dead babies does it take to screw in a lightbulb? Impossible, non-living organisms are incapable of moving and babies lack the brain capacity to understand how to screw in a light bulb.

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Why did the chicken cross the street? To get to your house. Knock Knock Who is there. The chicken.

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How do you drown a blond? By being an insane murderer!

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What did the boy with cancer get for Christmas? An amputation.

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Q. How much wood can a woodchuck chuck if a woodchuck could chuck wood? A. Actually woodchucks can't chuck wood only beavers can

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Roses are red,violets are blue you want me but i dont want you!

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Q: How do you stop a hobo from stealing your money A: You steal the hobo

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How can you tell Santa is racist? He doesn't give Africans presents.

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why do woman travel in packs? because men don't travel like the sisterhood in the traveling pants

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When life hands you lemons... do not squeeze them, for juice may squirt into your eye, causing severe pain.

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what did reed read? the most recent anti-joke

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Roses are red, Violets are pretty, look at their team, Surrender at 20.

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Why did my mom smell bad. Because she is a corpse and has been dead for some days now

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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