What did the farmer say when he lost his tractor? Where's my tractor?

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Why did the Jewish man commit suicide? Because he was not happy with his life.

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What happens when you divide by zero? According to the limits in Calculus, 1/x as x approaches 0 becomes closer to infinity, so we can safely conclude that if we could divide by zero, it would be a form of infinity. Positive infinity for 1/0, negative infinity for -1/0 and unsigned infinity for 0/0, as zero has no sign.

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why did the chicken cross the road? to commit suicide.

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What do you get if you cross a bomb expert, and a homophob? a blowjob

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Why didn't Kurt Cobain drive to work on Monday? He killed himself.

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Mullets

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What moos like a cow? Another cow

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What is worse than a bee sting? 2 bee stings What is worse than 2 bee stings? The Holocaust What is worse than the Holocaust? 3 bee stings

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Can a rabbit jump higher than a tree? No. Trees don't jump

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Yo momma's so skinny she doesn't have any fat!

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What did the suicide bomber say to the other suicide bomber? You're da bomb!

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Why was the Cubs fan sad? His wife just left him.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? It couldn't handle the stress and pressure of being a duck so it committed suicide by crossing a road and therefor being run over by a car.

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one day a boy was in his bed he woke up and stepped on his carpet,he then got out a bowl and some breakfast, 23 minutes later the boy rode to school on his bike and parked it in a bike room, he then sat down at his seat and pulled out his history book and waited for Mr Jonty Nicholls to finish his coffee so he could learn about hitler.

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What happens when a black man spills all of his grape soda? He cleans it up and recycles the empty can

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You know what's catchy? A cold

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What is the biggest lie in everyone's childhood? "School lunch food is actually good."

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An owl and a squirrel were sitting on a tree branch. An acorn fell on the squirrel's head and surprised, the owl moved its head 3.276 degrees to the right. The squirrel apologized for the inconvenience, but the owl would not listen, so flew off to buy a ferry to help children with terminal illnesses get to school.

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What's big and hairy my penis just kidding It's Bigfoot

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The guy above me has a very nice joke

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, Some poems rhyme, This one doesn't.

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What do you say when the cheese isn't yours? The cheese does not belong to me.

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What is an emulation? I am not as stupid as I seem by the way, I am just a bit shaky myself, but don't you worry i will answer whatever you need,

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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