What do you call a boy with no arms or legs that gets stepped on a lot? Mat.

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Q: What do you call 5 white guys sitting on a bench A: The NBA

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Why is my son so unhappy? Because I beat his mother violently in front of him

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What's big, grey, and can't climb a tree? A car park.

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why did the goat go up the ladder? because its ladder goat

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Why did the old man get wet even though he was using an umbrella? Because it didn't save from falling off the bridge.

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Peaches eat leaches, that is why sneaches live on beaches.

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Why are there so many black men in the NBA? Because they trained hard and practiced regularly to get there..

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What do a worm and a human have in common? They both have arms and legs apart from the worm

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A: If you were stranded on an island and you could only have one thin, what would it be? B: A boat A: That makes sense

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what looks like a sock and goes on peoples feet? A sock

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What do you call a Black person in a city with high crime rates? Whatever their name happens to be.

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Sherlock Holmes and Dr. Watson go camping, and pitch their tent under the stars. During the night, Holmes wakes his companion and says: 'Watson, look up at the stars, and tell me what you deduce.' Watson says: 'Someboby stole our tent.' Holmes and Watson look at each other, shrug and go back to sleep. At least the thief kept their blankets.

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Knock Knock. In about 10 seconds you'll be trespassing on my property, I suggest you leave immediately. Your suppose to say who's there.

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Pete and repeat were on a boat. Repeat fell off, who was left?

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Why did the chicken cross the road? It didn't. The chicken was ran over before it made it to the other side.

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There once was a plain Cheerio. He has a decent life with a low paying job and an apartment. One day, he decided to make his life more fun and started going to parties. He met some women and had a good time. He was happier and was soon promoted at work. The next day, he woke up and tasted himself, only to discover that he was now a Honey-nut Cheerio. He continued to go to parties and met a girl that eventually became his girlfriend. He became a manager at work and moved into an expensive condo. The next day, he woke up and tasted himself and was a Frosted Cheerio. He then quit his job and opened a club, where he became the most popular Cheerio in town. All guys wanted to be him, girls with him. At one party, his girlfriend asked him for some punch. He went to the kitchen but couldn't find any. There was no punch-line.

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I was so fat I went on a diet

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A military serviceman returns home from a tour of duty to find his wife in bed with another man. He feels betrayed and files for divorce, then later meets a more faithful woman with whom he has a more fulfilling relationship.

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what do you call an arse bandit? lady gaga's tanning salon attendants 3rd cousins dog chauffeur, roberto

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What do you call a mulsim that tattles on you for vandilising muslim propaganda Target Practice

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What's the difference between Jews and Germans? Jews are allowed to have an opinion about the Holocaust and hoot and holler and threaten anyone who has a different opinion than they. The sad, anti-joke part of this is that most morons will actually support this tyrannical bullying behavior. Also, special taxes against Germans that they're not allowed to have a problem with. I guess slavery is okay if you're White.

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what was so bad about hitler? he inadvertently subjected his political officials to death by rope

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Why was Sally's dad crying? Because Sally got raped. Why was Sally crying? Her dad raped her.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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