A police officer walks into a bar. He uses the ATM and withdraws 20 dollars. After greeting the bartender he leaves the establishment and proceeds to go on duty. The cop was really friendly.

What do an asian, a black man, and a Mexican all have in common? They all belong minorites that at one time have been outcast by society

3 men check in to a motel. They all decide to leave given the eminent danger of being the butt of a homosexual joke.

Everyone always gets up in arms over human trafficking... ... Well I kind of enjoy the convenience of air travel and so on.

theres a kitten stuck in a tree, whats wrong? it's dead

Why can't Helen Keller drive? Because she's a woman

Why did the chicken help people across the road all day? Because after past experiences the chicken decided to become a lollypop chicken and help people not make the mistakes he did

Making jokes about 9/11 is just plane wrong.

A man looks both ways before crossing the street he gets hit by an airplane

Two guys walk into a bat, they have a couple drinks then go home, one crashed and died in a horrible drunk driving accident. The other, who took a cab, went home and viciously beat his wife.

why did the chicken cross the road? To get away from the sadistic farmer with a loaded shotgun (as the farmer has an extremely large score to settle with the chicken, as his wife was dead, a cause of mad cow disease, an STD from the chicken, as the chicken is a pimp) thus escaping captivity and starting a new life as a free chicken. God save Martin Luther KIng

Why did the guy get hit by a bus? He walked out into traffic.

The philosophy professor decided to isolate himself in his closet until he figured out the meaning of life. After ten years, he had done it. He came out of isolation and immediately found one of his former colleagues on campus. He said, "I've discovered the meaning of life!" The colleague said, "Ok, what is it?" The professor said, "Life is like a bridge." The colleague said, "How so?" After a few moments, the professor nodded and said, "Yea, I guess you're right."

Why did the blonde switch the lamp on? Because it was getting dark

How can a chicken be dirty? It can be covered in dirt!

What would Walt Disney be if he were still alive today? Still anti-semetic

Q. If your rowing a canoe up a tree, how many pancakes does it take to get to the moon? A. None because snakes don't have armpits.

You know what they say about priests with big rosaries? I don't know, it's in Latin.

Yo mama so fat when she looked at the scale it said to be continued

A gay man walks into a biker bar and orders a drink. The bartender says "Hey, you want ice with that?"

Q: What's that white, sticky stuff on your mom? A: Glue

What do you call a dog with no arms and no legs. It doesn't matter what you call him he still won't come.

What do you call a black man with a wooden leg? A veteran.

"My c.ock is bigger!" "No! My c.ock is bigger!": Two gamec.ock owners arguing over who has a bigger dick.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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