- Anti Joke

Why did the little girl fall off the swings? Because she had no arms.

What is the difference between a Ferrari and 1,000 dead babies? I don't have a Ferrari in my garage.

My dads so gay he has sex with other men for fun.

The Definition of Megan Bates 800 Hamburgers

What's worse than getting a bruise? AIDS.

how did the asian man get on the internet? by opening his internet browser just like everyone else

Why did Bob throw butter out the window, Because he is mentally retarded.

Scott Gomez

Do u take sugar?

Roses are red Violets are blue This poem is random Microwave

why did the black man sit in the back of the bus? becouse all the seat where taken in the front

What do you call a vehicle has 56 wheels? Anything you want, because it hasn't been invented yet.

Q: What would George Washington do if he were alive today? A: Scream and scratch at the top of his coffin.

I saw a guy walking down the street like a black person. I just shook my head and smiled. He WAS black.

Steven Hawking walks into a bar. That is highly improbable, due to the fact he is in a wheelchair.

What comes after 23? 24.

WHO WANTS SOW????

This night was a particularly stormy one, many a crop destroyed, but the spirit of Little Jonny Harrison lived on with a shining light so strong it could emotionally blind those who may experience it's full potential. Jonny lived in Ristoville, a secluded village atop a hill. Citizens of Ristoville were frightened for there lives, all but Jonny, that is. Jonny was bullied from a young age, approximately 3 months, by his Uncle Clive, who was a Catholic Priest, full-time. Fear shined in the eyes of the normal residents, whilst, in Jonny's heart, there glowed a glow of pure hope, expectation and confidence, Jonny Harrison, was going to venture into the storm. Jonny knew he could amount to something, if he really really tried. He has 6 years behind him, and a long life ahead, and he figured, what's the worst that could happen? He pondered this, and ultimately came to the conclusion that there will be nothing worse out there that Uncle Clive's "Magical Basement of Happiness". Jonny sat his mother down in the family's precious leather chair, looked her in the eye and whispered a sweet farewell. He wished his father the best wishes possible, so now he is armed with the fact that his father is there for him, to help him further his adventure. Finally, Rosie Harrison, Jonny's sweet old Grandmother, who had been addicted to Crystal Meth for about 25 years now and been through 13 interventions and countless failed suicide attempts, opened her ears to young Jonathon's speech, he said softly in her ear, the words, "Hang in there, Gran. I know you can pull through, I may be only six but I sure as heck know how much i care for you.". The words of love echoed in her fragile little ears as Jonny walked away. He grabbed his stash of Cool Original Doritos, took with him a couple cartons of Apple and Blackcurrant Ribena, got his Grandfather's lucky medallion and his inhaler and took his first step outside. He whipped out a carton of Ribena, used the straw to puncture a hole through which to drink, strongly crumpled up the carton, slightly spraying pure fruit juice on his dungarees, and threw it to the drooping wet grass. He faced the towering lightning cloud and with a cry so intense, shouted, "Nothing will stop me!!". Jonny died shortly after of HIV induced AIDS. His Uncle Clive was sentence to 3 to 5 years, depending on behavior, in a high security prison for child molestation, frequent and consistant child abuse and paedophillia and smuggling Crystal Meth. Rosie Harrison died later that day.

whats long and stretchy? elastic

A blonde walks into a bar. She just graduated university and thought she would celebrate with a beer.

Why did the chicken cross the road? It didn't, most chickens are held on farms, but those that do roam free are afraid of automobiles so therefore they wouldn't go near a road at all. But if the chicken was located in a deserted town there would be no traffic, so then it would be able to cross freely over any road there and not get injured or mortally wounded.

Why don't you push a mexican off a bike, because its probably yours,

What do you call a black guy running from the cops? Nothing. He was out for his morning jog and he happened to run by the police.

How do you get rid of a pile of dead babies? Call 911 so someone will pick them up and take them to the morgue.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK! Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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