Q: what did a kid in harlem get for christmas? A: nothing he got shot

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A pig, a chicken, and a cow are born on 3 separate barns. They are raised by old men who subside off the grains of the field. When the animals mature, the farmers will butcher the pig, slaughter the chicken, and gut the cow. The farmer who raised the chicken may enjoy a few eggs first but the animals will all die eventually. Either of natural causes or more likely being butchered for profit. Cows make milk.

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, My name's Dave, Microwave!

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Why was the black man running? he was participating in race for the cure, a charity event where all proceeds go to breast cancer awareness.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? To visit his mother at the hospital who is dying of cancer.

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Roses are red, Violets are blue. I have Ebola, You're going to die.

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black people

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What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? An Irishman with a metal bar (like a pole)

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who lives in a pinaple under the sea? japanesse people!

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How many Jews can you fit in an ashtray? None

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Roses are red Violets are blue I like your mom Give me some glue

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, You're adopted.

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What do call a fly with no legs? Dead

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Why did the chicken cross the street? I would rather live in a world a chicken's motives would not be questioned.

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Whats worse than ten babies stapled to a tree? One baby stapled to ten trees.

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Q:why did the lion eat the zebra? A: because it was hungry.

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Hickory Dickory Dock My dog died today.

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how many cookies did the fat kid eat? a perfectly reasonable amount of cookies.

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A man finds a mysterious lamp on the side of the road. He picks it up, rubs it, and sells the lamp at a pawn shop for $10,000. The man paid off his credit card debt and was happy that he did not have to file for bankruptcy.

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Why did the first monkey fall out of the tree? Because he was DEAD! But why did the second monkey fall out of the tree? Because he was stapled to the first monkey... But then why did the third monkey fall out of the tree? P-p-p-p-eer pressure

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Well it doesn't matter because he got hit by a bus before he could even make it.

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why did the little girl eat grapes? because she felt like it.

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What did the Dinosaur say to the other dinosaur when he saw a huge meteor? Oh hey look a meteor.

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A black guy, a Mexican, an Arab and a white guy walk into a room and embrace cultural diversity.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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