What do you call a boy with no arms or legs that gets stepped on a lot? Mat.

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They say once you go black, you never go black. But clearly they weren't referring to Nigel, who had an average-sized penis at best.

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What did the muffin, say to the other muffin? Nothing. Because muffin's are inanimate objects, therefore incapable of speech, or any other sentient ability. They baked quietly until the man who was baking them came to the conclusion they were fit for consumption, devoured them, and went on with his day.

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A horse walks into a bar, and the bartender says "why the long face?" The horse says "I just found out I have AIDS"

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How do you get a bent nail out of a board? You carefully pry it out with the back of the hammer.

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Why was six afraid of seven? Seven liked to eat numbers lower than itself.

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what did the farmer say when he lost his tractor ? I lost my tractor!

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Whats worse than dying? Nothing.....?

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why was the child crying? because his friend just got hit by a van.

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What happened to Liam? He Died.

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Why did Mark get paralyzed? Because he was a famed football player that went drafted for the 1st pick but was later hit so hard that his spine com pulsed and tore

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What do you call a white man takeing orders from a black man? Batman and robin

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What did the dog say to the human? Nothing really. Dogs technically "speak" through barking.

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how fast does it take to kill a blonde? Give me a gun and i will find out

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Why is Six afraid of Seven? Because Seven is a psychopath, that's why.

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yo momma is so stupid she went and got her self checked for mental retardedness and it turns out she happens to be autistic.

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A dyslexic man walks into a saloon and asks for a hair cut.

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Blonde: Hey, what does "Idk" mean? Blonde's friend: "I don't know" Blonde: Thank you for telling me, that has been bothering me for quite some time now.

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Q: Why did the black man break into the house? A: Because he was poor and couldn't afford his daughters cancer treatment.

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YOLO You only like Oreos

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tuna fish dolphins sharks idk

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Why is the mexican navy so bad? They have insufficient funds to give to their military as they are a 2nd world country.

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69

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I was playing Black Ops online, my wife turned it off in the middle of the game....I killed her

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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