Where do cows go when they're bored? Wherever they're standing. Cows cannot use toilets, regardless of their mood.

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Justin Bieber walks into a bar. <>

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What's the difference between a dead baby and a carpet? I don't sell carpets.

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A man walks into a bar, looks to the right and sees a man one foot tall playing the piano, he sits at the bar and says to the bar tender,"I'm feeling kind of down" the bar tender gives him a bottle of very strong alcohol and later that night he goes home and hangs himself.

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Why Did sally fall off the swing? Because she had no arms

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a boy fell in mud... a kid took a bath with bubbles... bubbles was the girl next door!

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What's worse than a terrible joke? A worse joke.

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Top ten reasons Microsoft Doors is better than Microsoft Windows. 1. Easier to open. 2. Doors do not crash... Windows does! 3. Watching pron? Your mother around? JUST SLAM THAT SHlT ON HER FACE! 4. Saves power! (Its easier to just shut and open doors) 5. Doors are a lot easier to get trough than windows. 6. When windows wishes you welcome the first time you install it, you still cant wipe your damn feet on it! 7. Its easier to surf on the internet on top of doors than on windows. 8. While Windows is easy to hack because you can try codes forever, you can just buy a good lock on your door and shut it. 9.The sun glaring on your screen trough your windows? GET MICROSOFT DOORS! 10. I dare you make one, i live doing this shit. Capcom before. And special thanks to you! Thanks for playing! Capcom now: Fuck off thats not DLC paywall! its actual downloadable only content! Just pay 45 bucks to get all colors to all characters.... ...Downloading Allcolors 10kb

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Why couldn't the man see the camoflague iguana He could.

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How do you stop a baby from drowning? Take your foot of his head

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Knock knock. Who's there? Gestapo. Gestapo who? Your husband is dead.

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What did the African want for breakfast? Ebola cereal

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Why did the boy want to sleep in the same bed as his parents? His bedroom was on fire.

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My sister had a lemonade stand once. And one time, she spilled.

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Your momma;s so fat she stepped on the scale and said one at a time please!

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Keanu Reaves

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A young girl walks out of a bar then gets raped.

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Say this fast: Alpha kenny body sofa king hard with mike hawk. :)

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When im invisible you cant see me, i know

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why did the plane crash? because the pilot was a loaf of bread.

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What did the muffin, say to the other muffin? Nothing. Because muffin's are inanimate objects, therefore incapable of speech, or any other sentient action. They baked quietly until the man who was baking them came to the conclusion they were fit for consumption, devoured them, and went on with his day.

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whats the difference between a fur rug and a pile of dead babies? i dont lie on a fur rug to pleasure myself

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A boy says he is going to commit suicide. To stop him, a friend tells him not to do it, he'll regret it later in life.

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how do you get a rat out the house you lift it up and put it outside

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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