What's black and white and red all over? Nothing, becuse if something is red all over it cannot be black nor white.

This is like another one: Terry is at work eating a cookie.. He drops his cookie. His co worker trys to pick it up, however he accidently stands on it. Turns out terry can keep a grudge, nine years later, he killed his co worker with a shovel.

A black man and a white woman cross paths while walking on the sidewalk. After greeting each other, they continue on their way. Each goes on to enjoy their respective day free of racism and sexism.

Why shouldn't you worry about having a baby? Because with all these jokes, babies aren't even going to be around anymore. "What's funnier than a dead baby?" "A dead baby in a clown costume"

Why did the chicken cross the road? It felt like it, no particular reason. Why did the hippo cross the road? Same reason as the chicken. Why did the Fred cross the road? He was with animal control, and a chicken and hippo had just been reported to cross this dangerous stretch of highway.

A Man walks into a bar and asks for a shot. The Bartender proceeds to unload a 30 round banana clip into his head, neck, and midsection.

Have you ever seen a dinosaur? No

Heil Hitler!!!!!! Why thankyou General Himmler. Would you care to join me for supper this evening?

If you go to an animal shelter to get a pet god, you may be dyslexic.

Dusters blow stuff.

How come the man couldnt read the directions? He was reading it upside down.

How old is george washington? anyway thats not the point your pregnant

where did suzie go when the bomb hit her?? Everywhere

What's sad about 4 people in a Lamborgini going over a cliff? It was my car.

"Knock knock!" "Who's there?" "Interrupting Owl." "Interrupting Owl who?"

What was the mentally challenged kids first word? He was retarded so it wasn't a word.

how do you know when you've had too much to drink? . . . when you're dead.

A man is kidnapped shortly after being diagnosed with a new type of cancer in his left hand and is also left handed. When he is dropped off after being kidnapped it turns out a doctor hired the kidnappers to bring him a patient. The doctor notices the tumor is still in a stage where it hasn't spread to the rest of his body. The docter then claims to have a way to remove his cancer with minimal damage to the rest of him. So the doctor pulls out a laser sword and cuts off the man's left hand and says,"There, no more vancer for you!"

What happens when you put the batteries in BACKWARDS in the Energizer Bunny? Nothing. Nothing happens when you insert batteries backwards

Why didnt little timmy have a pencil? He was poor

How is pinocchio's nose like a penis? They're nothing alike.

Say this fast: Alpha kenny body sofa king hard with mike hawk. :)

I am reading the Terms of Service, however I don't fully agree with it's contents.

Yo Mama so stupid because she's been addicted to marijuana since she was a teenager, and has lost many brain cells. Resulting in her forgetting simple things like your birthday, her own name, etc. She has also developed lung cancer. She's predicted to die in two months if she continues to smoke as she does now.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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