Why did timmy's face turn red? Early that morning Timmy was brutally attacked by the local street gang which proceeded to smack timmy's face with a baseball bat and smearing the blood with a dirty rag.

What's the difference between a McDonald's and Michael Jackson? One is a fast FOOD restaurant, while the other likes having sex with little boys.

When life gives you melons, your probably dyslexic.

YOU AINT GOT NO PANCAKE MIX the preacher then bitchslaps the black man

Today, I found out that my parents are first cousins

What do get when you mix cancer and a bike? Lance Armstrong

Why did Sarah fall off the swing? She got shot in the head by her drunk step-dad.

Roses are Red Violets are Blue Your Adopted Deal With It!!!

you're so stupid, you have trouble understanding what you read, like the newspaper, for example

Why did the kids all eat their homework? Probably because they were starving to death and there was no other food source available.

Whats the differance between a blond and a rock? I don't know. I can't think of any.

Q. What's worst than getting kicked in the balls ? A. The holacaust

Why did the scarecrow get promoted? He was outstanding in his field

What's the difference between tiger woods and Santa clause? Tiger woods is a thug

whats the difference between marmalade and jam? you cant marmalade ur cock up a girls arse

Have you ever had Ethiopian food? Neither have they.

You know what makes no cents? 100 cents because 100 cents make a dollar.

what did the big chimney say to the little chimney ?? your to young to smoke

i know leaves are green because of chlorophyll but i don't know how to get a mortgage this is the kind if shit your parents pay for

A man went to the doctor with a strange complaint. "Well it's like this Doc, when I drive to work in the morning through the country lanes I start to sing 'The green green grass of home'. If I see a cat then it's 'What's new, pussy cat?'. It's so embarrassing, even when I'm asleep and dreaming, I still keep singing. Last night, it was 'Delilah', and my wife was not amused!" "Yes, it would apear that you have the early symptoms of Tom Jones syndrome." "Well I've never heard of that, is it common?" asked the man. "Yes," replied the doctor, "It is very uncommon."

Hhahahahahhahhahahahahhaahhayournanisdeadhahhahahahahahahah

Chuck norris is seen standing outside a bakery in Paris holding numchucks. He just finished lunch

Q: why do english soldiers have red coats? A: to cover the blood stains, so they can still lead their platoons when they are shot. why else?

Doctor, my husband tells me he doesn't like my figure .... That's irrelevant now, you've contracted a rare blood disease and will be dead within a month.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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