What did the virgin get for her birthday? Aids

Sarah: Knock knock. Jim: Who’s there? Sarah: It’s me, Sarah. Open the door. Jim: It’s me Sarah open the door who? Sarah: Please Jim, it’s freezing out here. Jim: That wasn’t a very funny joke, Sarah. Sarah: Shut the fuck up and let me in. Jim: Ok.

If you are American when you walk into a bathroom and American when you walk back out, what are you when you are inside the bathroom? You're probably dispelling waste products from your body.

A baby seal walks into a club.

What is Helen Keller's favorite color? Velcro

GADZOOKS!

Why did the man cry... He got hit with a fridge

No, you think faster smarter and harder than everyone I know, you change and adapt faster for each day, sometimes I just think one has to stop asking oneself what makes one happy, and simply choose to be happy.

Is the boy sleeping? No, he's dead!

Your momma so stupid that it's really inspiring she managed to overcome her limitations and raise such a wonderful family.

how many neggers does it take to screw in a light bul.... Nvm, Neggers be too busy screwing ur wife, plus they're lazy.

Ask if I'm a aardvark. Are you a aardvark? Yes.

What did the duck say to the mouse? Quack!

Why don't NBA basketball players shake hands after a game like players in NHL hockey...? ...Because it's a tradition in then NHL.

Knock Knock Yes?

What did the blonde say to the chicken? mmm, delicious

What do Alexander the Great and Kermit the Frog have in common? Their middle name.

What did Batman say to Robin before they got into the Batmobile? Robin get in the Batmobile.

Why did the chicken cross the road? like most animals that wander onto the road, it was completely unaware that the road can be very dangerous. It didn't go onto the road on purpose, it simply treated the road as if it was just like the rest of the ground.

whats purple and brown lucozade sport

What's the difference between a Lamborghini and 10 dead babies? I don't keep a Lamborghini I'm my garage

Why did the dude fall into a box? Because he was hit by a bus.

do want to hear a joke? Women's rights

What is 1+4x : No i will not take my pants off!

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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