As friend of mine recently told me that he knew my deepest darkest secret. When I asked him what it was, he said that I was too emotionally unstable, and that I would never be ready to settle down. I killed him.

Why did the chicken cross the road? Because he was persecuted for his faith.

What happened when the old man fell off the roof? He died....

How do you get a bent nail out of a board? You carefully pry it out with the back of the hammer.

roses are red violets are blue , but i would't know that because u never bring me flowers, you bastard .

"Is the Pope a Catholic?" Yes.

What do u get when u lick chicken Answer- Your a retard if you did not figure it out it is obviously chicken taste DERP!

if you like, i will tell my crush maddy i love her, just kidding i wont do shit.

brock has small hands for a small job

What do Connecticut school kids get at Christmas? Shot.

A man walked into a bar with his friend. He drinks a certain amount of beers, and has his friend safely drive him home.

Q. How many jews can you fit in a car? A. depending on the car size and make, oh and the size of the ash tray is also important

2 men walk into a bar. 3 come out

What do you call a blonde with 2 brain cells? Pregnant

oh my god! what? i heard this joke the other day and it was hilarious. ok, tell me? actually it doesn't matter i can't remember anyway.

mark is religion

What do you call the child of a black male and an asian female? A child of mixed ethnicities.

Yo mama so fat, she gonna die soon.

what do you do after throwing a water bottle in the trash? Hug a tree

Why did Sheryl Go to the Bathroom? Cause she had Direha...........

How long does it take a Jewish man to pleasure his wife? There are many factors that go in to pleasuring a woman, none of which are readily measureable

Why was the hiker upset? He was plummeting 1,500 feet to the ground after tripping on a rock too close to a cliff.

If it wasn't for my horse I'd never go to college.

why do cats hate dogs the Holocaust

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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