Q: How do you get a giraffe into a refrigerator? A: You open the door put the giraffe in and the close the door. Q: How do you get an elephant into a refrigerator? A: You open the door to the refrigerator take the giraffe out then put the elephant in and close the door. Q: The Lion King is hosting an animal conference, all the animals attend but one, which one is it? A: The elephant it's in the fridge Q: You have to cross a river that is inhabited by crocodiles how do you cross it? A: You swim across, the crocodiles are at the animal conference.

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once upon a time y o u m a d BIBIBIDYYEAHBIIBAIDYEAH THAT'S ALL FOLKS

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How many Catholics does it take to change a light bulb? None. They use candles

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How many Alzheimer patients does it take to screw in a lightbulb? To get to the other side.

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What did the black guy do to the hooker, he took her dead body out of his trunk

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Why is it pointless to brutally kill and dismember a Japanese man? You'd be satisfying his sexual fetish.

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I was sitting next to a man with jelly in one ear and peanut butter in the other, so I turned to him and said "Are you a trifle deaf?" and he said "No, I'm mentally ill."

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I went to work Got paid, Then came home.

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Why did the little boy cry? His entire family was shot and killed at his elementary school play including his 6 year old sister who has down syndrome.

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What did the pedophile get for christmas? He was raped by a gorilla

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sit on your hand until it goes numb and then touch yourself.

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Q: Why is there a crack in the liberty bell? A:Because someone droped it and it broke

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When Glenn looks in the mirror all he sees is Nicole Sipes.

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Roses are red, Violets are violet.

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Why is my penis so damn small? Cause the good lord made me that way

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Why did the chicken attempt to cross the road? To see if it could.

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who's sexually attracted to bones? James Cornish

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whats the difference between marmalade and jam? you cant marmalade ur cock up a girls arse

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Why did the teacher give the little boy a golden star? He was a Jew and it was in Germany during the 1940's

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What happened when the black man was pushed off the cliff? His bones shattered upon impact and he died almost instantly

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A man meets the girl of his dreams. Too bad the man will die in 3 days due to terminal cancer

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A man orders chinese food. His wife says "Honey, where's the cat?"

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whats long, hard, and full of semen? A submarine

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Why did the plane crash? Because the pilot was a loaf of bread.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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