How do you kill a blonde? The blonde you were planning on killing, Bridget, arrives home from a rather tiring run. She lets her hair down from her ponytail, and since it is rather long, it brushes against her round breasts. Even though she is a little sweaty, you realize what a beautiful woman she is, and you decide not to kill here. You instead ask her to marry you, and after she replies "yes", with tears of joy streaming down her face, you two make passionate love in the front seat of your 2011 Cadillac Escalade.

Why didn't the young child commiserate the death of his grandparents after they were simultaneously crippled by a tremendous avalanche whilst skiing? He didn't exist.

What would you call the Flintstones if they were black? You would still call them the Flintsones

charlie sheen becomes sober.

What is chewy and tastes like gum? Chewing gum.

Why did the chicken cross the road? It heard you like to choke the chicken.

A black man walks into a bar. The barman says 'We don't serve your kind here'. The man leaves and goes to a nearby bar that doesn't have racist staff.

What did the ice cream man ask the little boy? Want some ice cream?

what is orange red and blue, has wheels , and can talk? i don't know that's why i asked you

Why do we need to keep answering encryption codes? Because you can't keep a good Jew down (Wyndellberg)

Knock knock Who's there . I said who's there. Sadly this poor man didn't understand he had just been door bell ditched.

Why did the chicken cross the road? To get to the black person

What's the difference between a black man and a bicycle? ( I don't know. ) You're so racist.

What's worse than crying over spilt milk? The Holocaust.

Confucius say: Man who fart in church probably has a medical condition and should not be made fun of because that is cruel.

s o m a a d i t u n y s n i t a c s d c ' s k h k s t o e l y e

Whats the definition of not winning? Charlie sheen losing custody of his son because he is a coked out, old man douche bag, who only gets told what he wants to hear because he forks out lots of money to gold digging hookers.

Q )Why did the black man shoot the white man? A )The black man had been walking home from his weekly gospel service at the local church when suddenly the criminal had stopped him in his tracks. In a desperate attempt to save himself he seized the gun from the white man and shot him in the leg in order to defend himself. He survived.

So this beautiful woman goes to see her doctor and says "Doctor i think i have a fever." the doctor replies "I think I've got just what you need. open your mouth." The woman opened her mouth and the doctor gave her some Advil "This should help your fever. that will be $300." in shock the woman said "these prices are to high."

What happened when the blind man was running toward a cliff. He stopped before he fell.

A boy was crying. He had been abused and beaten by his parents, and thrown in his room. He was devastated, and wanted to kill himself. He tossed and turned in bed, and moaned himself to sleep. When he awoke, he felt a chill up his spine, noticing that all of his blankets had been torn off of his bed, leaving only him and his mattress. He open the window, and jumped out of his three story building. Luckily, his bedroom was on the first floor. He ran away, and found a rich family that loved him so much until a week later, a murderer came and killed everyone, including him.

Whats the difference between black and white. Nothing they're both colors.

Oh my God! A talking dog!

Is a tomato a vegetable? Depends if it is comatose.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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