whats fat round and bouncing off the ground= George goodburn

A pirate walks out of a bar. He drowns in a puddle.

Two drums and a cymbal fall off a cliff. They all fall on a small boy below, putting him into a 20-year coma.

i hate christians and muslims, until drugs are involved. iduno what dat is, i try it.

What is the difference between a dog and God? A dog is physical living creature while God is a supernatural being.

A black man walks into a bar. The bartender shoots him.

Why does the same anti-jokes pop up over and over again? Because people have no creativity.

I met a fat girl and fucked her on an elevator. . . It was wrong on so many levels.

"It's A Bird!!!" "It's A Plane!!!" "No, It's not either of those things."

What do you have if you have 100 rabbits in a row and 99 step back? That would be a very unlikely thing to happen, unless a mildly scary predator was released in front of them, or they weren't all stepping back at the same time.

What do you call a Mexican playing basketball? A man of hispanic heritage that enjoys the sport of basketball.

Q: What's the difference between a black man and a park bench? A: A park bench can support a family of four.

What did Steve jobs tell bill gates? Please pass the salt.

why did the ginger cross the road to go to hell

What did Batman and Robin say when they were going to the Batmobile? To the Batmobile

Why did the plane crash? The pilot was a loaf of bread.

What did the mute girl say to the other mute girl?

My friend asks me what my mom does for a living and i told him that she is a nurse. Then he says "That a good job because she is able to save lives". I quickly reply "She works in an abortion clinic".

what's the difference between a dead baby and a lamborghini? I don't have a lamborghini in my garage!

And more;

So one day There's a normal average day cheerio walking down the street, just walking along, when all-of-a-sudden he sees the most gorgous frosted cheerio in the world. This frosted cheerio has the most out smooth curves and just sparkles all the time and he immiediately falls in love with this frosted cheerio. So he walks up to the Frosted cheerio and says "Oh my goodness, you are the most beautifal frosted cheerio i have ever seen in my entire life, your just so stunning! Do you wanna marry me?" "Oh thats so sweet of you" said the Frosted Cheerio "but we could never be together because im a gorgous frosted cheerio and your just a normal cheerio". Determined, the Cheerio decides to clean up his act, goes and quits his job at the newsstand and applies for a job at applebees working his way up through the chain of command until a few months later when he finally is manage and becomes a Honey nut cheerio. He then goes to the Beautifal Frosted Cheerio and says "Look at me now! Im a Honey Nut cheerio and we can be together!" "Oh i do appreciate the effort" says the frosted cheerio "But im a frosted cheerio and your just a honey nut cheerio and i dont think it would work out". Even more determined, the honey nut cheerio decides to quit his job at the applebees and decides to go to college and after 8 years of intensive practice, the Honey nut cheerio finally has his Doctor's degree in Optomology and becomes a Frosted Cheerio. He then runs to the Frosted cheerio and says "Look! Im finally a frosted cheerio we can finally be together!" "Oh, Wow" says the beautifal frosted cheerio "Now we can be together!" The two frosted cheerios go on to have an incredibly happy marraige and are in the process of naming their first born child. The husband cheerio goes to the bookstore and buys a young cheerio name book, but after many hours of searching the book has no good names. So the husband goes all the way across the country to get an even bigger book of baby cheerio names and yet, they still cannot find a good name for the first born. Taking a break from finding the name of their first born child, the couple visits their local carnival and after going on many rides the wife becomes quite thirsty so she asks her husband " Honey, could you fetch me a glass of sprite? so the Husband goes to the Sprite line and he waits and waits but the line is just too long. "Im really sorry dear, but the sprite line was just too long" "Oh its fine honey you can just get me some Coke" Happy to get his wife some beverage the cheerio finds the coke line but yet again finds that the line is just too long. "Honey, Im really sorry but the coke line was just way too long" Dissapointed, but still thirst the wife says " Well i guess i could settle for some fruit punch" So the husband leaves but unfortunatly, There was no punch line.

Why did the blackjack player gamble every night and day and not eat, sleep, or use the bathroom? To practice for a tournament in which the grand prize was to save his dying grandmother.

There are two muffins sitting in an oven. One muffin says "It sure is hot in here." The other muffin says "Holy shit a talking muffin

Why is ms Wolfe mean? Because she is a poop face

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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