What's the difference between a Jew and a pizza? A pizza is a tasteful meal and a Jew is a person of Israeli decent.

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A mosquito flies into a bar and orders a bloody mary, the bartender then takes out a swatter and kills the pest. Noticing the event, the patrons cheer and continued drinking their frothy beverage. Minutes later, the phone rings and the bartender answers the phone. "Hello?" "Hi, I'm looking for a friend of mine, is he there?" "Let me check, by the way, what's his name?" "Jack Hoff" "One sec. HEY FELLAS(yelling over the noisy bar), IS THERE A JACK HOFF HERE? I NEED A JACK HOFF! ANYONE?" Mr. Hoff, sitting at the bar hears this and asks, "who is it?" "He said he's a friend of yours!" "Which one?" " He said his name's Dick Stroker and he needs help on something hardhe'll meet you around back." "Oh ok, thanks."

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WWII veteran screamed! "You damn yellow monkey" "But sir... ...my fur is brown!" Replied the monkey.

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Knock knock. Who's there? Come in.

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Knock Kock Who's there? Boo Boo who The ghost from Mario

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???????????? ???????????? ???? ???? ???? ???? ???? A wild EXEGGUTOR appeared!

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You have Aids. April fools! you have super Aids.

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A homeless guy on the brink of starvation found one dollar lying on the street. He took it and bought a lottery ticket at the local drugstore. God was looking down on him with pity that day and decided that day that he would no longer be a vagabond. The next day, the homeless man won the lottery jackpot, worth 100 million dollars. He declared that on that day, he was the luckiest and happiest man alive. He then woke up in a pile trash.

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Knock Knock Who's there? St. Judes St.Judes who ? St.Judes Research Hospital calling. Give me money, I've got cancer kids dying

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A white person at Harvard

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Why couldn't the kid get in to see the pirate movie? It was rated PG-13, and he was only 11. Plus, he had no money, and his mother didn't want him watching movies like that.

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What did the Dragonfly say to the Mosquito? Nothing. He ate it.

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A muslim walks into a bomb store. He is a police officer and quickly arrests the owners of the store because of the obvious legal violations.

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what did the little boy get from santa claus on christmas? nothing santa isnt real

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When the tsunami hit in 2004, christians worldwide prayed for the victims. it didnt help

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How many blondes does it take to screw in a light bulb? That would depend on the individual situation at hand and to assume you could accurately estimate that is ridiculous.

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what is the difference between a banana and an orange? bread.

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Roses are red. Violets are blue. and Asians are yellow.

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What do you do if you can't go to the Wednesday Night Market on Wednesday? You go on Thursday

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Q:John has 50 candy bars and he eats 45, what does john have? A: Diabetes

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What's worse then finding a worm in your apple? Finding two worms in your apple.

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Your momma's so stupid that she was declared mentally retarded by her doctors.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? it was thrown

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What did the blonde say to the brunette? We both have hair

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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