What do Ethiopians do for dinner? Starve.

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What's worse than dropping your ice cream? Getting a virus that slowly deteriorates your body from the inside out.

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A baby seal walks into a club.

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If you are American when you walk into a bathroom and American when you walk back out, what are you when you are inside the bathroom? You're probably dispelling waste products from your body.

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GADZOOKS!

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What is Helen Keller's favorite color? Velcro

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LOL May Wong

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How do white people screw in light bulbs? They read a manual.

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What did the virgin get for her birthday? Aids

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Sarah: Knock knock. Jim: Who’s there? Sarah: It’s me, Sarah. Open the door. Jim: It’s me Sarah open the door who? Sarah: Please Jim, it’s freezing out here. Jim: That wasn’t a very funny joke, Sarah. Sarah: Shut the fuck up and let me in. Jim: Ok.

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How do you stop a clown from laughing? Hit him in the face with an ax.

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Carl has 300 candy bars. He eats 295. What does Carl have? Diabetes. Carl has diabetes.

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how many neggers does it take to screw in a light bul.... Nvm, Neggers be too busy screwing ur wife, plus they're lazy.

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Is the boy sleeping? No, he's dead!

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Your momma so stupid that it's really inspiring she managed to overcome her limitations and raise such a wonderful family.

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No, you think faster smarter and harder than everyone I know, you change and adapt faster for each day, sometimes I just think one has to stop asking oneself what makes one happy, and simply choose to be happy.

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What do Alexander the Great and Kermit the Frog have in common? Their middle name.

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An old couple walks up to me and says, "can you take our picture? It's our 50th anniversary." I reply, "sure." Then I pull the man to the side and ask, "how do you make a relationship last so long? I can't make one last 50 days let alone years." He leans in and says, "cheat"

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Why did my penis cross the road? To get to the other vagina.

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Knock Knock Yes?

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What did the blonde say to the chicken? mmm, delicious

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Why don't NBA basketball players shake hands after a game like players in NHL hockey...? ...Because it's a tradition in then NHL.

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Ask if I'm a aardvark. Are you a aardvark? Yes.

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What is 1+4x : No i will not take my pants off!

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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