What did Kim Kardashian say when she got a breast implant? DERP!

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Whats red and yellow? A chicken in the blender.

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What did the farmer say to the cow on the roof? Get off the roof.

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Why do jews get their foreskin cut off? Because they're jewish.

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Why did Suzy fall off the swing? She was a donut.

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I DON'T KNOW WHAT WE'RE YELLING ABOUT!!! LOUD NOISES!!!

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Q: How do you make scrach paper? A: Take a paper and scrach it.

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Have you ever tasted Ethiopian food? Neither have they.

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How come little billy couldn't ride a tricycle? Because he was born without legs due to a rare disease and therefore can't pedal.

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Why did Sally fall off the swing? She has no arms. Knock Knock "Who's there?" Not Sally!

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how do you make old people hate eachother? put them in a night time psychology class

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A caterpillar and its mom (a butterfly) come upon a lion eating an antelope. The caterpillar says "Mom, why is the lion so mean to the antelope?" The mom replies: "it's the circle of life." The next day, the caterpillar and his mom witness a bird of prey swooping down and eating a mouse. The caterpillar asks why the bird of prey is so mean and the mom responds by saying its the circle of life. The next day, the caterpillar and its mom come across a trail of dead animals. They follow the trail to the end where they see a great lion. The mom opens her mouth to say its the circle of life when her son jumps up and eats the lion. THE END.

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how many neggers does it take to screw in a light bul.... Nvm, Neggers be too busy screwing ur wife, plus they're lazy.

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What did the kid with no arms and no legs gets for Christmas? Cancer

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What did the fish say when he ran into a wall? Fish don't run.

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How many Jews can you fit in a Volkswagon? 2 in the front seat, 3 in the back.... and that's it because the holocaust never happened.

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What did the football coach say to fire up his team? Nothing. He was not legally allowed to say anything to his team as they were being locked out by the coach's boss, the owner of the team and anything that he said to them could lose him his job.

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3 men are stranded on an island when they come across a brass lantern. The rub it and nothing happens. They all starve to death a day later.

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Colloqiual irregularities are a significant part of the English language, and excellent example of this is between can and may.

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Three decapitated children walk into a bar..... If you are laughing at this....what the hell is wrong with you?

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Two men walk into a bar. You would have thought one of them would have seen it.

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What do you get if you cross a Kangaroo and a Sheep? They are too entirely different species and cannot be crossbred.

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I hate cripple jokes! I just can't stand them!

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Who enslaves small people and forces them to work in his factory all year round in ridiculous outfits. Santa

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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