Q: How do you get a clown to stop smiling? A: Hit it with an axe

Roses are red My binoculars are blue The curtains are open I see you

What happened the magic tractor? It turned into the feild!

knock knock GO AWAY I'M IN THE SHOWER

How do you keep a black guy out of your backyard? You tell him "STAY OUT"

Why hasn't Justin Bieber gone through puberty. Usher Chopped his balls off.

What's worse then dumping your' girlfriend over text? Dumping her best friend over text at the same time.

Why is a giraffe's neck so long? Because it's head's so far from his body.

Q:Why did Billy drop his ice cream? A:He was hit by a truck. Q:Why did the clown fall off the swing? A:He was hit by Billy. Q:Why did the clown's friend fall off the swing? A:He had no arms. Q:Why did the chicken cross the road? A:To get to Billy's ice cream.

Why did the chicken cross the road? It didn't. The chicken got crushed by a fridge.

Why was 6 afraid of 7? because 7 was black

5

A blonde tries to kill herself cutting both her wrists.Why didn't it work? Because her boyfriend found her just in time and managed to stop the bleeding and took her to the hospital. After some years of therapy they got married and lived happy together for the rest of their lifes.

Why was the picture ruined? Because you were in it.

why did the asian go to the bar?? i dont know you tell me.

How many dead babies can you fit in a trunk? 37.

A man stumbles across a magic lamp. He doesn't believe in genies, so he sells it for profit on the antiquarian market.

I asked my Grandma if she ever tried 69. And she said, “No, but I have done 53 -- that's all the sailors I could screw in one night.”

Why was 6 afraid of 7? Because 7 was a registered sex offender

If you wanna hear a joke scroll down this page more

Roses are red, Violets are blue, Some poems rhyme, But this one doesn't.

What do you get when you cross a blond with a plank of wood? A blond with a plank of wood on her head.

Knock knock Who's there doorbell Doorbell who Doorbells can't knock

Quizno's footlongs are four dollars...

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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