I was approached the other day by an officer as he asked... "Son where are your parents?" I replied, "I dont know i'm an orphan" The officer then laughed and walked away

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A russian gives away vodka.

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Why did the lebanese man kill his own family? He had cancer.

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Why did Mr. Moseley choose to not buy crest toothpaste this month? Because your daughter got an abortion.

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roses are red violets are blue i am muslim

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Getting up, the 2nd hardest thing in the morning.

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whats a cross between michael jackson and arnold shwarzanegga? Michaelwasanigga

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Knock Knock Who's There? Your Best friend. Did you forget what I looked like?

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Why was the comedian so funny? Because that's his job, and if he wasn't funny he would have to become a hobo.

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Knock knock. Who's there? Super Monkey Ball. Super Monkey Ball who? No wonder it's super.

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A guy walks into a bar, orders a drink, and nothing interesting happens.

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A black man sits down to have a legal conversation with his state appointed attorney for the first time being arrested. They lawyer advises him to tell him the truth of exactly what happened. He proceeds to do so and is provided with excellent legal advice.

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A guy walks into a bar with a Donkey and a jar full of pennies. He walks up to the bartender and orders ten shots of whiskey. He was found dead the next morning from erotic asphyxiation.

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What the difference between Adolf Hitler and Michael Phelps? Micheal Phelps can finish a race.

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What's white and sticky? A white stick.

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once there where 3 guys on a beach. they found a bottle and a fetis came out.. later they found out 2 of the 3 had cancer and the 3rd was a vegetable.

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What happens when 2 gay men rub their penises together Jello

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Knock Knock. Who's there? An astronaut. He's all alone in the vacuum of space. No one hears him knocking.

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What happened when the child missed his school bus home? He had to take the long 6 mile walk back home and did not return until dinner time.

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why was the child crying? because his friend just got hit by a van.

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what did one barstool say to the other what theres a butt on me

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A dermatologist walks into a strip club. He tells the stripper she has hives on her back and that she needs to go to a clinic, then gets up from his lap dance and reports her to management.

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Why did sally fall off the swing? She had no arms.

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The President, The Pope, and a small child are all in an airplane when the pilot announces that the plane is going to crash. They crash into the ocean and quickly remember that there is a life vest under their seats, which they promptly put on and safely inflate after exiting the cabin of the aircraft by pulling down on one or both of the red tabs.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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