Q: What's the worst part of 3 Mexicans dying in a car accident? A: They were my friends.

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Two guys are on a bridge. One commits suicide, the other one is called John.

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A Jew,Spiderman and The Incredible Hulk all jump off the top of the Empire State Building,who hits the ground first? The Jew because the other two dont exist

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what do you call a black man that sells drugs

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Whats worse than cold feet? getting your feet chopped off.

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Knock Knock The homeowner's acquaintance had called him just minutes prior because he had forgotten something at his house. With this having occurred, the homeowner had a strong sense of who was at the door. Being a cautious person however, he checked his prediction by examining the man through the door's peephole. Having asserted that it was what he had in mind, the homeowner opened the door and handed him some papers that were of importance to the acquaintance.

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Why was there a black guy in the back of a police car? He was caught stealing

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Roses are Red Violets are Purple Not blue

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Q :Why cant mexicans be firemen A :because they get mixed up by Hosea and Hose B

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What did batman do before getting into his batmobile? - Look for the keys.

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if your paddling a backwards canoe up a waterfall and it loses its wheel, how many pancakes does it take to fill a dog house? the answer is 17 because aliens are allgeric to cows and mustard.

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Why does annie put 2 balls together? bacuse its makes a BUTT! oo

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Knock, knock. Who's there? Polite cow who recognizes normal social cues and civilly waits for its turn to contribute to a conversation. Polite cow who recognizes normal social cues and civilly waits for its turn to contribute to a conversation who? Moo.

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Holy Fish Sticks Batman! Batman and Robin were at a church and saw a priest eating fish sticks.

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A black man and a Mexican man are both in a car. Who's driving? The white man who is also in the car with them.

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A grasshopper hops into a bar. The bartender looks down at him and says "Hey, we have a drink named after you." the grasshopper looks up at the bartender...then proceeds to hop along because Grasshoppers can't communicate with humans. Then several of the bars patrons looked at the bartender, worried for his mental health.

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Nobody likes you ya noob! (-_-) *sniff* MAN YOU SMELL BAD

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What's the difference between a Jew and a pizza? One is a human being belonging to a particular religious minority and the other is a delicious Italian food favoured by English speaking western cultures. The problem with this anti-joke is that the facts are not correct, pizza was originally invented and China; however,it looked quite different then what might be considered pizza by our standards, when pizza was brought to Italy it was improved to make what we now consider pizza in modern times. While some people may consider pizza an Italian food, this would be failing to give credit to the Chinese who invented it.

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A brick bent down to suck my flapjack, Then he got stuck, oh what the unpleasant, This angered the brick, he lay on the grass, he shoved a stick straight up his bellybutton.

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just sit down and dont be a Jew

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What did Helen Keller do when she found a dead body? Nothing.

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Q. How did the man with no legs get to places? A. He didn't, he died at his house alone

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Who you gonna call? Gobstoppers

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Why did the man commit a serious crime? Because he couldn't think of any funny crimes.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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