Everyone always gets up in arms over human trafficking... ... Well I kind of enjoy the convenience of air travel and so on.

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How would you punish Helen Keller? Make her read a basketball.

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Why can't John hear what Muhammad says? John is deaf.

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Why did the girl fall off the swing? Because she had no arms.

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What happened when Sally got hit by a truck? WHO CARES CALL 911!!!!

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Why was the middle-aged doctor morbidly obese? He liked bacon and was severely hypocritical.

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Billy and Jeff wanted to go on an adventure so they planned a safari in Africa. Everything was going as planned until they were in a sticky situation: whether to cross a narrow bridge above the crocodiles or not. Billy tells Jeff "Hey whats the worst thing that can happen?" Jeff was diagnosed with cancer and died the next morning.

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What's the resemblance between a chicken? Its legs are approximately equal, especially the left one.

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What do you call a guy wearing a white leisure suit? Mister Rourk? No, you call the dud wearing the white duds.

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Tell you something funny.

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why did the kid cross the road he didnt he had no legs

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I wrote a joke for 'Anti-Joke', I laughed, it was funny.

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Why did the little boy throw his clock out of the window? After hours of searching for the snooze button to no avail, the little boy became so irritated at the incessant ringing of the alarm that he threw it out of his window in a fit of rage. The clock landed on an old woman who was walking twenty stories below. She was immediately killed on impact.

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A man with ADD walks into a bar, what did he say? Look a squirrel!!!

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Why couldn't the blonde read the road map? Because she was blindfolded and tied up in the trunk.

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Why did Sarah fall off the swing? She had no arms. Knock. Knock. Whos there? Not Sarah.

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Why wouldn't Jimmy ever eat his vegetables at dinner? As a young boy, Jimmy watched as a robber entered his house, suffocated his mother by clogging her airway with a cucumber, and escaped with their life savings.

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Why aren't there any painkillers in the jungle? because of the unethical and unscrupulous practices of big pharma

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fduck

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Q: Who's afraid of the big bad wolf? A: A couple of pigs with questionable carpenter's skills, and maybe Red Riding Hood. Grandma wasn't so lucky.

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What do you call a dog with 5 legs? A dog with 5 legs.

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what's funnier than a dead baby? a lot of less tragic things

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What did the wizard say to the man? Wizards aren't real. Thus not able to speak.

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What is worse than breaking your pencil? Flying on a magic carpet

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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