how may i help you

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How to apply total justice 1: Kill all humans! Moral: "Why do I have to die while he gets to live? Nobody gets to live? Sounds fair and just to me!"

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This is an anti joke with a difference. It's funny.

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Whats worse than bitting into a apple and finding a worm? Being the worm who just lost nearly half his whole house because some jerk decided to eat an apple on the ground, whom after eating the apple destroyed the worms self-esteem by making the comparison to the worse thing possible. Or being raped by Zeus in the form of a worm.

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A Chinese man walks into a bar. With his thick accent, he finds it difficult to order drinks.

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Knock knock. Who's there? Orange. Orange who? Knock knock. Who's there? Orange. Orange who? Knock Knock. Who's there? Orange. Our experimental treatment for Anterograde amnesia has failed. I will inform your family.

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why was the boy crying. Brcause him and his two sisters got raped by a diseased polar bear. by rangler. thumbs up for more.

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Knock knock. Who's there? Louis. Louis? Go away!!! Your jokes are so bad! Geez, you guys really don't like me. GET OUT!!! (Door slams; Louis shuffles away with a sad look on his face) -Louis

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-Hey I know something funnier than 24, ---What? -25! Hey I know something funnier than 25. ---What? -The Holocaust!

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How did Swiper steal Dora's stuff? He shot her and then took her backpack.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? He didn't. Our fast paced American society holds little value for birds of any species and this particular chicken was flattened by Ford F-150.

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Whats 10 times worse than a war? Ten wars.

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What did the walrus say to the Penguin. It said MAHHRGH. because walruses can't really talk

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A Muslim terrorist walks onto a bus, with the mindset to blow him and the other 27 people. Before he steps onto the bus, he realizes the error in his ways and decides to not follow through. He goes to the airport instead.

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Roses are Red Violets are Blue I have AIDS we're dying together

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Q: How many pandas does it take to screw in a lightbulb? A: I don't know.

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I had sex with your mom. It was f*cking terrible.

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Nero, thank you for this opportunity, I desire to join the shadows, I left a thumbs up. Michelle

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Why did the black man fail math? He had missed many classes due to his mother's terminal cancer.

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How do you make a telemarketer scream? Set him on fire.

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What did Little Jojo get for Hanukah? Nothing he is Muslim.

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Knock, knock! Who's there? interupting little turtle interupting little tur... LITTLE TURTLE!

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Other Guy: What are you looking at? Me: You.

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How did superman always save the day? Because he was a fictional tv actor so he could do whatever he wanted to.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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