How many Jews died in the Holocaust? Not enough.

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A guy walks up to a girl and says: " hey can I have your number so can I have your text you later?" she says " no" he says " why ?" she says" guess" He says " look if you don't like me thats okay, " he gets up and walks away, turns out she doesn't have a cell phone, she was gonna give him her house number to call.

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Why can't Hellen Keller drive? Shes been dead for some time now.

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Knock, Knock Whose there? your friend Oh ok (opens the door) (it was not his friend but instead it was a giant panda who robbed him of his goods).

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If life gives you lemons, give them back. They were probably stolen, and even if they weren't, lemons are a pretty shitty gift to give someone.

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why did the duck cross the road? More than likely there was something that appeals to the duck on the other side such as a pond or duck food. On the contrary there could also be something that did not appeal to the duck on the side from which he is departing from such as a lack of a pond or a lack of duck food.

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Ask me if I am a tree Are you a tree? ..no

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A priest, a rabbi, and a Buddhist monk walk into a bar. They discuss their differences over a pint of beer and leave with a greater understanding of each other's faiths.

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Q Why is an octopus like a tree? A Haven't the foggiest.

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What does this joke have in common with a ruphies party? They both have an unpopular punchline.

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How do you stop a baby from flying? Hit it with a shovel.

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Why is six afraid of seven? Cuz the chicken crossed the road

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Why didn't Valerie go on over to Amy's house? Because she's dead.

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The hippo's an African beast, Who notably is quite obese, Quite boorish and mean And never too lean And poops in the rivers, at least...

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*Knock knock* Who's there? Stab.

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holocaust jokes are bad, anne frankly they annoy me

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Why is the kid over-weighted? Because he had to many calories in his diegestive system and he couldn't burn the calories

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What's green and falls fom a tree? A dump truck. I lied about it being green.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because he has Obsessive Complusive Disorder.

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Roses are red. Violets are blue. I am colourblind so screw you!

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Why do you give a blond a gun You dont

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What has wings but is often on the ground? An aircraft that has frequent take-off problems.

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The Olympics

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What's red and invisible? No Tomatoes

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

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The Anti Joke Book


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