Why did the first monkey fall out of the tree? Because he was DEAD! But why did the second monkey fall out of the tree? Because he was stapled to the first monkey... But then why did the third monkey fall out of the tree? P-p-p-p-eer pressure

How do you get 100 people in one car. You can't.

No, its just his eye, its infected, he gets fever and well, that is all I should say. Nero is my friend and I do not like it when people lie to him, he is outside having a cigarette, I do not think he wants to speak with you anymore. Bye.

1,2,3,4,5... 6.

What's the resemblance between a chicken? Its legs are approximately equal, especially the left one.

What did Abraham Lincoln say to his slaves? Nothing, Abraham Lincoln had no slaves.

phone and phone charger were talking to each other suddenly a massive hand swopped down to the charger and another hand came down and grabbed the phone they both started screeming so the hand stabbed the phone with the phone charger so the phone said... ALL I DID WAS SCREEM (RANDOMZZZ) (L.W)

Q: What happens when you hit a man with a car? A: You speed away hoping no one saw, you spend the next month and a half agonizing over your crime as it consumes you because you think of the poor man's family, then you either go to prison or hang yourself from a fan all because you wanted road dome....

Why was the man called Big Larry? His name was Larry and he was morbidly obese.

A cat walks into a Chinese restaurant. It is then asked to leave.

What did the cat say to the dog? Nothing, animals are in capable of formal cumunication.

Why didn't the gangster cross the road? Because he J-walked and was hit by a car.

What's brown and sticky? A stick.

Why is 6 afraid of 7? Because 7 is a terrorist.

How did OJ get away with murder? No one really knows. Probably because he an excellent group of lawyers

Where did Susie go in the bombing? Nowhere. Susie is the bomber.

knock knock There's no door

Caller: Is your fridge running! Callee: ... umm yes? Caller: I guess you don't need my services. Thanks Callee: ok bye

what do you call a door made of steel? a steel door

A Jew walks into a shower. Gased.

Q. How many blondes does it take to put in a lightbulb? A. Cause of 7,8,9!

3 men check in to a motel. They all decide to leave given the eminent danger of being the butt of a homosexual joke.

What do an asian, a black man, and a Mexican all have in common? They all belong minorites that at one time have been outcast by society

Yo mama's so poor, she doesn't have a lot of money.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...