What was the last thing the clown said to his wife before she died? Rebecca, just stay with me, the ambulance is almost here.

What does a paralysed mans legs feel like? We don't know, he is paralysed

homework

why did the slytherin cross the road twice? ... because they are double-crossers.

Have you seen Stevie Wonder's new girlfriend? Neither has he.

There is a new film coming out, it is a re-make of "Fatal Attraction" The only difference is, it is about two tonnes of antimatter... [L]

You’re so dumb that many individuals find your intelligence inferior.

If a man shouts in a forest and there is no woman around to hear him, is he still wrong? He could be, he could not be. It really depends on what he says. The greater concern is that he's shouting alone in the forest. Either he's in trouble or he has a major psychology disorder.

johnny goes to the shops asks the lady at the counter, can i go home The Lady says ..... Buy one get one free

Some peoples attempts at being funny on this website are the stupidest things i have ever read.

After the haitian revolution, Haiti lived happily ever after, Until god smited them with a devastating natural disaster

What does Tupac and Elvis Presley have in common? They're dead but most of the people think they aren't.

What's worse than losing a basketball game by 1 point? Dying of lukemia.

A convict escapes a prison he's been in for 15 years. He's soon tracked down by police and put back in jail where he'll serve another 2 years of jail time along with his 5 remaining years.

did you hear about the platypus that was found dead in the middle of death valley?

Roses are red, Violets are blue. Some dreams stay dreams, But some dreams come true. Some want to be god, They want to have made us. But I want to be an astronaught, So I can explore Uranus.

I was at the ocean, and I saw a screaming fish. Then it died.

Once upon a time there was a small poor boy in a small German village. Her was name Smalls. Later he found out that he had to go back to Virginia because of their family then she got milk and went to the play that night like he was planning, and it was probably a problem with the clutch or transmission. It was fine because Smalls was 64 years old.

A panda walks into a restaurant, sits down and orders a sandwich. After he finishes eating the sandwich, the panda pulls out a gun and shoots the waiter, and then stands up to go. "Hey!" shouts the manager. "Where are you going? You just shot my waiter and you didn't pay for your sandwich!" The panda yells back at the manager, "Hey man, I am a PANDA! Look it up!" The manager's heart skipped a beat, and he locked himself inside his office, trembling with fear and confusion. Yes, it was plausible that a beast such as this could point to a random entry on the menu, and it was physically possible for it to pull the trigger of the gun (and, at such close proximity to the waiter, it would be pretty hard to miss him), but it was shocking and altogether disturbing to hear such an animal speak in human language, much less vernacular English.

Q. How do you break into a store that's closed? A. You walk in, I was lying about it being closed.

whats worse then finding a worm in your apple? getting stranded on an island with your best friend and realizing several days later that you will have to eat him to survive. hours after eating your friend a boat saves you and now have to live the rest of your life knowing you ate somebody.................... oh and the Holocaust

Knock, Knock? Who's there? Its Gilly.

How do u get a clown off of a swing? You hit him with an axe.

Why did the baby die? Because he was shot in the hea repeatedly

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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