Q: What did the blind boy get for his birthday? A: He doesn't know

thumb_up thumb_down +8

A Mexican, an Italian and an American all walk into a bar. They order their drinks and have pleasant conversation, and all return home to loving families safely and securely.

thumb_up thumb_down +8

A blind man walks into a bar, and a table, and a chair.

thumb_up thumb_down +8

Roses are red,Violets are blue, Who the hell are you,Get the hell away

thumb_up thumb_down +8

Whats the difference between an apple and an orange? A banana because a motorcycle has no windows.

thumb_up thumb_down +8

What does a black guy do to a white girl when the lights go off and there's a bed in the room? They go to sleep so they can have enough energy to work their two jobs and provide for their family after they've been evicted from their home.

thumb_up thumb_down +8

Why did the chicken cross the road? It was feeling suicidal due to an existential crisis.

thumb_up thumb_down +8

whats the difference between Michael Jackson and a shopping cart? One holds groceries. The other molests small children.

thumb_up thumb_down +8

roses are red, violets are blue.

thumb_up thumb_down +8

What did the golfer do on his vacation? He played golf.

thumb_up thumb_down +8

Why did the little boy die? His mother got an abortion.

thumb_up thumb_down +8

What is big, grey and can't climb trees? A car park.

thumb_up thumb_down +8

cats are pussies

thumb_up thumb_down +8

What did one Black man say to the other Black man before they ate? I hope you're hungry!

thumb_up thumb_down +8

Blue fish occasionally consume large amopunts of the insides of oak trees.

thumb_up thumb_down +8

Roses are red, Violets are blue. I have to use the bathroom.

thumb_up thumb_down +8

What happened when a Black man ran into a white supremacist? They exchanged insurance information

thumb_up thumb_down +8

Roses are red, violets are blue you may not know this but I'm falling for you . <3

thumb_up thumb_down +8

I saw a guy walking down the street like a black person. I just shook my head and smiled. He WAS black.

thumb_up thumb_down +8

How many pancakes does it take to fill up a doghouse? None, because ice cream doesn't have bones.

thumb_up thumb_down +8

what did the teacher say to his student? do your work.

thumb_up thumb_down +8

You know I can, and I already have, as once the mind knows its getting certain medications, it spends the energy required in order to achieve the effect, this is what psychiatrists and those assholes would call "psychological effect". With that said, I am still tired, and the stimulants are waking up my ouchies too, so I think ill get some sleep and dont worry, I can sleep with any stimulants as long as I can use my mind. By the way, my "hypnosis senses" are not hypnosis by themselves, but in order to hypnotize oneself and other, one must learn to read body language and stuff like that, something which I now do subconciously because I am experienced. Alice is calm again, her hands are shaking but she is cold, I am pretty sure she is far more tired than I am, so I kinda ordered her to go home, this guy can type for me. Just want you to know that I am doing fine now, and that the PTSD is much less severe than before as my brain no longer remembers the voice and looks my parents had back then, so I just feel my nose getting punched and breaking, its... Surprisingly annoying, so ill get some sleep, if nothing else it will help Alice get better, and I wont lie, I need it.

thumb_up thumb_down +8

An owl and a squirrel are sitting in a tree, watching a farmer go by. The owl turns to the squirrel and says nothing, because owls can’t talk. The owl then eats the squirrel because it’s a bird of prey.

thumb_up thumb_down +8

hardy har har.. i should be working on a school project right now!!

thumb_up thumb_down +8

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops