What happened when the man was about to hug the sexiest person he ever saw in his life? He hit the mirror.

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Once upon a time, there were two brothers jumping on a bed. Q: The one stopped. Why? A: His brother fell off, cracked his head, started uncontrollably bleeding and died.

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Why did the Koala fall out of the tree? It got hit by a stone. Why did the second Koala fall out of the tree? It was hit by the first Koala. Why did the third Koala fall out of the tree? It thought it was a game. Why did the Kangaroo die? It was hit by three falling Koalas.

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A bar walks into a man. The drink orders a bartender. And then the money walks home. End The.

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Why was the turtle blue? He wasn't you are color blind.

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69

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what is red, black, and blue all over? A horribly painted room.

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What is Oedipus' favorite tv show! How I Met Your Mother

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A polar bear walks into a bar, sits down, and says, "Can I have a.........................beer?" The bartender asks, "Why the large pause?" The bear responds, "I have a speech impediment"

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Q:How do you know if you have a big enough oven? A: If the jew fits

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A Jew walks into Macy's

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How many Jews does it take to fill a shower? As many as it does to fill an ash tray.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because it was playing Pokemon Go.

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Whats plastic and little boys turn it on? A game cube, and Michael Jackson. Well maybe not anymore since hes dead...

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What's the difference between a black man and a Jew? Their ancestral heritage

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There once was a man named Steve. One day, Steve stumbled stupidly, shredding his shirt, shoes and shorts and subsequently shocking Susie; a small shy salsa student. When he arrived home, Steve's wife asked "how was your day dear?" Steve panicked at the thought of having to explain this traumatic event, but thankfully he had undergone speech therapy for his lisp.

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whats the difference between a mexican and a fish? one is a human being while the other is a fish, what did you expect?

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Q: If it takes a chicken a day and a half to lay an egg and a half, then how long would it take a monkey to kick the seeds off of a dill pickle. A: I don't know. That's a stupid question.

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How did the black man get put in jail? He didn't, he never did anything illegal

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What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? The Holocaust.

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What's better than a $75 000 salary? 80 000 sticks of celery.

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Why did the kid eat so much ice cream? Because he wanted to eat ice cream.

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A pirate walks out of a bar. He drowns in a puddle.

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you and your family will die tonight

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops